Clearing up the confusion
Just a little warning before proceeding with this column.
We have to view issues and problems besetting us always within the context of hope. No matter how grave our predicaments are, we should not forget there is always a reason for everything that happens in our life, good or bad, and that God is always in control.
For those who believe in God and love Him, everything will always work out for the good, 'omnia in bonum.' (cfr Rom 8,28) Let us remember that we cannot know everything about a certain problem. We should do all we can to tackle it, but neither should we neglect to abandon ourselves always in the wise and merciful providence of God.
In short, no need to worry so much and to get stuck at the level of mere lamenting and complaining. We have to tone down our voices and restrain ourselves from making wild reproaches and quarreling. There is hope. There is always some cure, even if unavoidably we have to go through some cleansing and painful process.
Let us look more at what solutions we can offer, what alternatives there can be to give relief to our burdens. More importantly, let us try to decipher more distinctly what God is trying to tell us, for after all he is the one who holds the ultimate key to things.
What is more needed is to pray and study, perhaps make consultations, come up with plans and trials, and a lot of patience and optimism. At the same time, let us not be unstinting in our efforts to carry out the proposed resolutions and solutions that have been duly thought out.
At the moment in Rome, a synod of bishops is going on.
They are tackling a most delicate issue on marriage and family. The whole exercise deserves all the prayers and sacrifices we can offer, since whatever findings and recommendations it will make will certainly have great and crucial impact on the world and the Church today.
Days before it began on October 5, a group of marriage experts and marriage advocates wrote an open letter to Pope Francis and the synod members, tracing the current serious challenges facing marriage and the family.
It is good to refer parts of it to give us an idea of how serious the problem is and what solutions we can expect to tackle it.
We certainly now have a world culture that throws us all into confusion. Aware of these things, we can at least pray and offer some sacrifices, so the synod can do its task well.
Here it goes:
"Dramatic increases in cohabitation, divorce, and nonmarital childbearing in the Americas, Europe, and Oceania over the last four decades suggest that the institution of marriage is much less relevant in these parts of the world... In the US... more than half of births to women under 30 years of age now occur outside marriage.
"Between forty and fifty percent of all first marriages in the US are projected to end in divorce... While every nation is unique, studies show that the impact of these trends spans the globe.
A small sampling of such studies: China, Finland, Sweden, Uruguay, Mexico, Greece, Africa, and East Asian Pacific nations... "Studies of pornography's impact on relationships suggest it is a major contributor to the destruction of marriages..."
Though we do not have available statistics for our country, we can safely say that we go along these trends. But like I said, there is always hope. And these experts are making suggestions. Among them:
- A serious study on the role of pornography in the marriage crisis.
- Educate seminarians to be more adept in marriage and family issues, and train priests to showcase in their homilies the spiritual and social value of marriage, contemporary challenges to it, and parish help for troubled marriages.
- Create networks of strong married couples as mentors at the parish level, available to give spouses the tools to sustain healthy, lifelong marriages.
- Educate parishioners on the extraordinary influence they can have on the marriages of friends and family.
There are still many more. Let's hope that the synod can come out with more concrete and doable ideas. It cannot be denied that we are facing a world that is immersed in all kinds of sophistries to rationalize some ideas and behaviour that are clearly at odds with our human nature, let alone, our Christian vocation.
Let us always remember that marriage and family is vital for the health of each person, on the one hand, and society in general, on the other.
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