Hasta la vista, Apophis

As you read this, the asteroid Apophis shall have whizzed past Earth, blowing us a kiss from a distance of 14.5 million kilometers, far away enough for most of us to notice or even be concerned about.

In Cebu, people were more interested in the numbers either of two simultaneous rallies were expected to generate -- one to show support for suspended governor Gwen Garcia, the other called for by the acting governor and the man seeking to take over Capitol.

Interestingly, neither the acting governor nor the man seeking to take over the Capitol showed up at the activity they called for, opting to keep their distance just like the asteroid Apophis, which is said to be named after a demon in Egyptian lore.

But Apophis, which at an estimated 270 meters in diameter is as big as three football fields, will not be keeping its distance forever. It is expected to be back in 2029 at a much closer distance of 30,000 kilometers.

If you think 30,000 kilometers is still too far away, consider that our very own moon, the pockmarks on whose face the naked eye can even see, orbits the Earth from a distance of only 385,000 kilometers. Consider as well that communications satellites are just 36,000 kms above us.

But the worse is yet to come. Apophis will not only be back but will be back much closer than we can hope to dismiss with an impertinent shrug of the shoulders. In 2029, or just 16 short years away, this asteroid will be nearer Earth than the satellites that help along your tweets.

At three football fields in size, Apophis is said to be capable of generating a force of 25,000 Hiroshima bombs if it impacts the Earth. If it does, it will probably not matter who sits in the Capitol at that time, or whether my friend Bobby Nalzaro manages to get back to writing.

If, God willing, I will still be around at that time, I probably would be too old to care about some wayward extraterrestrial rock hitting this planet of ours but definitely not too old to continue to rock n' roll.

I can imagine myself playing my 60s music out loud trying to test the equilibrium of the neighbors. Or, as I often kid the wife and daughters, prefer to be surrounded by young Japanese girls, a preference now interchangeable with young Korean girls, ha ha.

Fortunately for everybody alive today, Apophis will not hit us in 2029 yet. All it will do then is give us a mighty good scare. A distance closer than even present-day communications satellites is too darn close not to become repentant and religious.

 What is more worrisome that even scientists are getting concerned is the so-called non-negligible possibility of Apophis actually smashing into the Earth in 2036. The chance for impact in 2036 is small but it is there. So, hasta la vista, Apophis.

Initial calculations for impact in 2036 places probability at three percent. Three percent from zero is too high for human comfort. What comfort people can console themselves with under such circumstances will probably be the thought that it will be over in a puff.

Of course, between now and 2036 is a long long time. Besides, it is possible God will intervene and issue a TRO. An asteroid ending all life on Earth is probably not how God wants the great human saga He directs should come to a close.

A word of caution though, belatedly. What you have been reading has not been qualified by scientific fact other than those researched or obtained from the news the past few days. All the rest are conjectures and mine, said in jest to lighten up the current somberness.