Advice to Mike & Tom

Every New Year’s Day, I help preserve the ecology. I don’t throw away my resolutions. I recycle them.

* * *

I don’t know how to put it. But lemme try: My problems usually last longer than my New Year’s resolution.

* * *

Here’s an advice to my politician friends like Tom O. and Mike R. If you are bothered by undesirable questions from reporters, do what the mayor of Guayaquil, Ecuador did. He appointed a parrot as his official spokesman, er, spokes bird.

* * *

 “Some people talk only nonsense to me,” said Guayaquil Mayor James Negot. “So the parrot will answer back in the same way.” He said it’s a waste of time answering nonsense questions. “The parrot can do it for me,” he said.

* * *

Knowing that I’m sick and in sort of bad shape, my “long lost” friend Ricky Toledo paid me a visit last Christmas eve. He’s my friend who laughs loud and clear like my other friend Jesse Bacon.

* * *

Ricky has maintained his “fighting weight” (his words) at 140 pounds although he eats a lot and drinks (not water) a lot. I asked him what keeps him physically fit and trim, he laughed and said: “Laughter.”

* * *

Ricky whose advocacy is laughter, explained that laughing for at least 10 to 15 minutes a day will keep the fats away.

* * *

I don’t know who Erma Cohen was or is but a statement attributed to her had me stunned. She said: “You couldn’t get me on Mars if it were the last place in Earth.”

* * *

Personal. Thanks... to Leonard Crane, my colleague in the now defunct Trade Journalists Association of America for remembering; to Rene Bacangoy for the box of something for the stomach; to Rep. Benhur Salimbangon and Dr. (PhD) Nering Dino for the apples; to SMB for what else but beer.

* * *

Special thanks to the Salesian Sisters who visited me to cheer me up with religious Christmas songs and prayers for the sick. Thanks too to their lady companions each of whom “crossed” me on the forehead for good health.

* * *

OVERHEARD. A barbecue cook and her PUJ driver husband were talking about what they read in Banat News. WIFE: “Nganong anha pa man gyud matug sa kapitolyo si Gwen nga mas komportabli man didto sa ilang bay? HUSBAND: “Mahadlok nga dili na unya siya makasud balik sa iyang opisina.” WIFE: “Kay ngano man diay? Gobernador gud siya.” HUSBAND: “Wa ka kasabot sa imong gibasa diha sa Banat” Gisuspenso si Gwen.” WIFE: “Kinsa man nagsuspenso niya?” HUSBAND: “Haay atimana na lang nang imong barbecue oy.”