Your presence is more valuable than your gift

Fr. Jerry M. Orbos, SVD writes this story in his book, “Just A Moment." 

"The story is told about  three brothers, who after years of  hard work and leading busy lives,  wanted  to make  their 83-year-old  mother happy, especially on Christmas Day.   To make up for the years when they neglected her and took her for granted, the  eldest gifted her with a big house. The second son surprised her with a limousine,  and the youngest gifted her with an expensive parrot  that can  recite the whole Bible.

"After the holidays, they received a thank you note from  their mother. To the first one she wrote: “Thank you for the house, but it is so big I can’t clean  it myself. “ To the second  son  she wrote,  “The  car is so beautiful but I can never use  it  because I have nowhere to  go.”  To the youngest, she scribbled, ”You gave me the best gift .  The chicken was delicious.”

The story might  be humorous, but there’s a moral lesson behind it — what counts most is not the present but the presence of our loved ones.

I am reminded of a tenant who worked  in  the U.S . for five  years. After her work contract expired, she came home. She found that her eldest son was indifferent and tried to distance himself from her.  When she had  the chance to talk  to  him he said,  “You  think that I was happy with the gifts and dollars that you sent? What I need is your presence!”

Writer Carrie Rocha  of “www.pocketyourdollar.com”, commented, "Your presence  is more valuable than your presents. I am talking about giving  your  loved-ones two very specific, very reasonable, very free things:

Give your  attention. Your  attention  is your rarest commodity.  A treasure.  Give that treasure  like you  would   a precious  gemstone to  those  whom you  treasure.  Your   attention   is more  valuable  than  your  time because  you can exist in  a  moment, but miss  the experience of  it. If  your loved ones don’t  have your attention,  then  they  don’t have  you.

Give your appreciation. Simple phrases like,” Thank you”,  “My life is better because you are in it,” ”I love you,”, can heal wounds, fuel fires and reignite passions where embers once  burned  dim.

Make  it  your  mission  to mention  and enjoy the magnificent qualities you see in others. Mix  those  emotions with a  deep respect and you’ll communicate  admiration. Notice the unique talents, abilities, character and qualities  of those around  you. Then  point  them  out.  Your words may work a miracle.

Stop  the frantic pace. Stop the disengagement. Stop the fault  finding.  Instead, give your  presence  to  your loved ones, in doing  so you make their day.

As Van Harden  once said, "The  best  times we’ve  had on  earth    are  usually  with those we love.”