The recent number of suicide incidents in the city is disturbing. It is sad enough that young people are usually involved. What’s worse, the manners of suicide have become more violent.
For example, the mere thought of falling from some height already sends shivers through the spine of a regular person. But over a week ago, someone jumped from a tall building. What was going on in his mind in the few seconds before the fatal leap? How was he able to conquer his instinctive fear?
The fear factor, psychologists say, is innate in every person. It is there for a purpose – self-preservation. Fear protects the individual from falling into disasters and from engaging in self-destructive excesses. It makes him watchful of his conduct, watchful of the pitfalls of living.
Fears are supposedly part of learning, part of living, part of life. Fear of harsh consequences keeps us from making serious blunders. It makes us work hard for good results. It motivates us to exercise good judgment always.
We can, indeed, be wiser and safer by heeding our fears. We can be more productive, too. Fear can make us more mindful of our involvements; and prompt us to be more conscientious in our undertakings, lest these will fail. In the area of relationships, we become more devoted to our loved ones, for fear of losing them.
All of us have fears, no matter how self-assured or solid some of us may appear to be on the surface. The only difference is that some people do better in either concealing or dealing with their fears; it’s simply survival art.
And yet, there are those who will swear of not being afraid of the very things that others fear. Some have undergone several training in fear management; others pride of just being born fearless. These people can’t really explain the feeling, except to say that they’re just not afraid.
It would certainly do good for many of us to be a little less afraid. We need to be a little bit bolder, a little bit more confident of ourselves. We need some kind of an inner-conscious assurance that whatever little risks or horrors there may be, these do not matter in the bigger scheme of things.
Boldness and self-confidence are traits that help a lot in securing our own wellbeing. It is wise to always have our hesitations and our fears in check; to understand what makes us cow out from certain life situations. Why do we dread taking or making a certain phone call? Why are we avoiding a certain person or issue?
Many times fear hinders us from doing what we need to do. We withhold our kindness from our poor neighbors, because they might become dependent on us. We avoid showing our affection to our loved ones, because they might abuse it. Unsure of what our good deeds will lead to, we hold ourselves back.
These are the kinds of fear we need to conquer. The fears that constrict our humanity, the fears that make our spirit wilt, not flourish; the fears that indicate sheer cowardice.
But some fears need to be in place, to compel us take good care of ourselves in order to prosper. A total absence of fear is scary. To be so fearless to decide on self-destruction is not bravery – but a cowardly surrender.