A young man confided that he is on the verge of separating his wife because of financial problems. His wife wants only to pay a portion of the expenses because he has other children in his first marriage. She said that it is not her obligation to pay for the needs of his other children, and she is only obligated for their two children.
He told her that it would be better that they should pool their financial resources together as husband and wife. But his wife doesn’t agree to this idea. She said that she wants savings of her own.
It seems that his wife is having some fear and uncertainty when it comes to money matters. He believed that it’s because of her experience in her family while she was growing up. Her father was abusive to her mother because she had no work.
I told him that it is sad that their relationship and their family would suffer because of money matters. I suggested that they should divide the payment of the expenses according to their income if it is impossible for both of them to come to terms on the issue at hand. This is the same arrangement that my cousin does in her marriage.
Life coach Michelle Evans exclaimed that marriage is one of the best moments of one’s life, especially if you marry the person that you truly love. In reality, however, married life is faced with many problems. Money matters is one of them.
If you are faced with this kind of situation, Evans shares some tips to avoid financial crisis in marriage:
Be frugal. When you decide to marry, you must be willing to change your spending habits. Because being married is totally different from being single. You should not waste your money on things that are not necessary.
Look for ways to supplement your income, if you feel like your income is not enough for your daily expenses. If possible, aim for a higher position in your company or perhaps, look for part time jobs in businesses that could help you to augment your daily income.
Be debt-free. As much as possible, pay all outstanding loans and debts before you decide to get married. And when you are married avoid applying for bank loans and other mortgages that have high interest rates. This will just add to your daily expenses and this can lead to argument with your spouse in the future.
Distribute your daily expenses. If both of you are working, do not let your partner pay for all the bills and expenses. You must allocate your daily expenses and decide which among these bills will be paid by you or your partner. Come up with a schedule of payment so that your spouse will be reminded of how much of his/her salary needs to go for the payment of that expenditure.
Have a savings. Your spouse and you must agree how much of your income be used for savings. There’s nothing like having a savings for the rainy days.
There are several other reasons why couple would often fight about financial matters on their married life. Aside from the tips above, it’s very important to be honest with your partner at all times. You must work hand-in-hand in resolving crisis because marriage is a partnership and not just about you.
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Email: kathey_oyson@yahoo.com.