Haven
September 29, 2002 | 12:00am
I spent a good part of my Monday at the Tiaong Breast Haven in Tiaong, Quezon upon the invitation of founder Danny Meneses.
I first heard about Danny in 2000. He was my husband’s high school classmate. My husband told me that Danny’s wife, Rosa, was very ill with breast cancer and he wanted to help. By then their Philippine Breast Cancer Network was already up, running and active. That year ABS-CBN ran its first telethon for the Rosa Meneses Breast Cancer Foundation. Shortly after, Rosa passed away.
On her second death anniversary here I was, in a hut overlooking a lush, unsullied mountain, hearing Mass not only for Rosa, but for the realization of a dream that had held steady and focused, despite the heartbreak that surrounded it. Around me, a vibrant group of breast cancer survivors sat, most of them muddy from an early morning symbolic hike. After Mass, people were introduced and asked to say a few words. Everyone spoke, from the people who own the land to the carpenter who is still busy building huts.
Later, as we toured the premises, Danny reminded me it wasn’t a hospital. It was a place for women who had accepted their illness; a place where they could rest, nourish their bodies with whole, organic food and fresh, spring water, meditate in total silence, breathe clean air and live in the heart of nature while working to regain balance in body, soul and spirit. "This is for women who want to fight," he said firmly. "For those who haven’t given up."
As he walked me to the car, he shared that everything seemed to be coming together for him, from the lot to the funding. Help simply arrives when he needs it. It happens so often he no longer questions it. He just accepts the blessings and forges ahead. It isn’t always smooth sailing, there are never enough funds, but he keeps going. He does what he needs to do.
I left that place so inspired. It was just what I needed to calm my fraying nerves. There are days I want to get out and move my children to a safe place with clean air and water, at the very least. Yet every time people talk to me about migrating, I know it’s just not the thing to do. This is my country. My soul belongs here.
I think my frustration, fear, and anger have finally brought me to a place of clarity and, hopefully, productivity. I know that we have to buckle down to work to make this country a good place for our children. We’ve been complacent long enough. It’s easier (more fun?) to blame government, our culture and heritage, the Spaniards, Americans, the church–anyone and anything that might be big or able enough to rob us of our will and inherent power. Hah. That excuse doesn’t work anymore.
Today I know that change is in our hands. I don’t have a big, complicated, 25-year plan that involves government support, industrial funding and metaphysical inspiration. No. It begins with the desire and commitment to do what you can, where you are.
That’s what struck me about Danny Meneses and his group of breast cancer survivors. They came together for a purpose that began with them, as individuals, coping with life-altering changes. From this experience, they moved towards a bigger goal driven by a clear sense of purpose. What they have in Tiaong is a community, not only of women with breast cancer, but also residents of the town who contribute their special talents and services towards the building of the haven. Together they are living something they believe in. I felt and witnessed how this energy has illuminated the true and pure in all of them.
I’m sure it’s as simple as consciously doing our best wherever we are. That’s how change begins. It’s giving back the suitcase of money that was left in your cab or telling the waitress she forgot to charge you for a dish or two. It’s not cutting through lines or running red lights just because you can. It’s being responsible enough to have someone drive you home when you’ve been drinking. It’s treating every living thing with respect. It’s living consciously and honestly, no matter the pain; no matter the price. It’s striving to be whole and true at every moment. This is where it begins.
To make this work for our country, we have to take it a step further. Day in and day out we must commit to putting one foot ahead of the other towards our higher selves. From there, we can harness our sense of purpose and bring that creative energy and commitment outward and back into our community. Baby steps, you know? But each little step counts.
This quote from Goethe, recently shared by a friend, says it all: "The moment one definitely commits oneself the Providence also moves.
"All sorts of things occur to help which would not otherwise have happened. A whole stream of events flow from the decision bringing all kinds of unforeseen incidents, meetings and material assistance which no one could have foreseen. Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic. Begin it now."
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