My mom as a shining example

Several years ago, my mother Marina was bumped by a man recklessly driving a pushcart, fell and hit her head on the pavement of a sidewalk outside the Greenhills shopping center. The pushcart was overloaded and the man behind it couldn’t see what was ahead. He figured people would just make way for him to go through. My mother never saw him coming and was bowled over.

We feared for the worst. After all, my mother was in her early 90s. She was immediately brought to Cardinal Santos Hospital for emergency treatment but doctors found nothing wrong. Later, my mother underwent a CT-Scan under the care of Makati Medical Center neurosciences department chair Dr. Regina Macalintal-Canlas. Remarkably, if not miraculously, her brain showed no signs of the sidewalk incident – no contusion, no concussion. All she had was a slight bump on the head.

Dr. Canlas was so impressed by what she saw on my mother’s CT-Scan that she called her staff to marvel at the visuals. My mother’s brain was closely encased in the membrane and in much better condition than others who were over 20 years younger. No wonder my mother’s memory and cognitive thinking are almost flawless. She remembers things she experienced when she was a teenager just as vividly as she remembers what happened in her visit to the mall the other day.

It isn’t just my mother’s mind that’s amazing. She is, in fact, an amazing lady. And my brother Ramon, two sisters Vicki and Irene and I are truly blessed that our mother is a shining example to us all. Today, my mother turns 99. My sisters, who live in the US, visited a few weeks ago to be with our mother. My brother, who also lives in the US, will spend two weeks with her in March. We’re planning a rare family reunion here when my mother celebrates her 100th birthday next year.

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What makes my mother truly special is not just her age or her mind. She came from humble beginnings as the third of seven children and left her birthplace in Albay at the age of three to move to Manila with her parents. On the boat to Manila, a storm nearly turned the vessel over and my mother remembered a passenger assuring her mother that in case of a tragedy, he would save her. My mother’s father Joaquin, an auditor with the Philippine National Bank, died at the age of 45 when she was only in Grade 3. Her mother Elvira Ramos thought of giving her up for adoption when she was 10 because there was little to feed her children. When the pick-up van of the Philippine Independent Children, an adoption agency, came to fetch her, her mother changed her mind. My mother relied on relatives to pay for her education and moved from home to home as she studied at Quiapo Elementary then Zurbaran Elementary and Sta. Ana Elementary School.

As a girl, my mother was taken in by relatives who paid for her elementary schooling in exchange for cleaning house and taking care of her younger cousins. Then, a cousin Petrona Navarrete Crisol enrolled her as a high school freshman at the Institute of Accounts, Business and Finance on Rizal Avenue. The school is now Far Eastern University. My mother became a working student and went to class at night starting her sophomore year. The Institute’s founder Dr. Nicanor Reyes, Sr. put up a night school so my mother worked in the school library during the day. Her older sister Rosario was also employed by the school. My mother and her sister rented a two-storey apartment on 1814 M. Natividad Street, near Rizal Avenue, for P18 a month and brought in their mother and two other sisters to live with them.

Less than a year after graduating from high school, my mother accepted an offer of P40 a month to work as a secretary with Filipinas Compania de Seguros. Eventually, she met a dashing insurance executive Gregorio who worked in the same building as she did on Escolta. They were married in 1942 and I was their fourth and youngest child.

When my father passed away in 1986, my mother took over his insurance special agency at the age of 70. She remains active in the business and has received numerous awards from BPI-MS (Bank of the Philippine Islands-Mitsui Sumitomo) as the company’s most senior agent. My mother still picks up premium payments from clients, turns over the checks at the office and keeps a tight record of her accounts. She hasn’t wavered in providing personal service through the years.

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My mother doesn’t play mahjongg nor cards. But a few years ago, she taught herself how to play the keyboards. She writes her own checks, does her own ATM transactions and is never late on her bill payments. Two years ago, when she was bestowed the Distinguished Tamaraw Award during FEU’s 85th founding anniversary at the FEU Auditorium in Manila, she walked up the stage on her own, unaccompanied, unescorted, to receive her medal from FEU chair Lourdes Reyes Montinola – whom she recalled wearing her St. Theresa’s College uniform as a little girl picking up her father on Fridays at the campus to go home over over 80 years ago.

There are 10 things that make my mother a shining example. First, she is hard-working. She has never been afraid to put her hands to work. As the saying goes, you reap what you sow. Second, she is deeply religious, devoted to our Lord and the Blessed Virgin Mary. When anyone in our family needs spiritual guidance, my mother offers novenas and prays. She is our link to the Man Upstairs. Third, she is honest. She is uncompromising when it comes to integrity and we, her children, are committed to the same principle. Fourth, she is generous and unselfish. She gives of what she has, particularly to the less fortunate. Fifth, she is independent. She has her own mind, she is self-reliant and self-sufficient. Sixth, she is self-confident. She knows what she is capable of and does things on her own. Seventh, she is humble. She never forgets where she came from, those who helped her and always gives back. Eighth, she is level-headed. My mother isn’t driven by emotions. She thinks things through and decides what is best under the circumstances without prejudice to anyone. Ninth, she isn’t frivolous. She eats healthy and her staple diet of fish and vegetables is her recipe of longevity. She’s a wise spender and is never extravagant. Finally, she has a heart of gold. She is caring and thoughtful. When it’s Christmas, she gives to as many people as she knows – secretaries at her doctors’ clinics, security guards of BPI-MS, bank tellers. She is a friend to everyone and everyone’s friend. She doesn’t miss sending birthday and Christmas cards to family abroad. She never fails to send over your favorite food or sweets. When you’re sick, she’s the first to visit and look after you.

I can never thank God enough for my mother. She is the most cherished blessing of our family. God has given her a long life to be a shining example to us all, to inspire us to live a good Christian life and to show us the true meaning of living for others in God’s name. Happy birthday to you, my dearest Mom, and may the Lord shower you with more years of happiness, fulfillment and gratification.