The Easter gift of family

Though Easter is about revisiting, renewing and reviving our faith, for many it has become an avenue for rest, relaxation and repairs, instead. Be that as it may, the occasion often becomes an opportunity to be with family. For some of us, that in itself is challenging enough, as time, politics, personality clashes and little hurts drive us apart enough for us to drift even further away. The sad reality is that, for some of us, holidays are a reminder of how alone we can be. But this is where faith in a loving God can step into the void, and serve as bridge and healer.

Having been in sports all my life, I naturally searched for a connection in my own family tree. Of course, you all know my story: I never knew my Irish – German biological father John William Schöen until an uncle traced him to San Diego. I met him in 1988 while covering the Optimist Junior World Golf Championship there. Another priceless gift from sports. Prior to that, our only sports connection was that he had been an amateur heavyweight boxer at one point as a student. I visited with him again in 1989, after which he disappeared anew. He missed all the major crossroads of my life. There was a time I felt deeply betrayed, because I had given up basketball and being an Ateneo Blue Eagle to search for him. At the time, dual citizenship was not allowed, and the chance to play for the Philippine team beckoned in the distance. But finding my father was of utmost importance to me then. It is a decision I constantly revisit.

So he missed the births of my children Vincent, Daniel and Alexandra. He missed knowing what wonderful, inspiring people they are and will be. He missed seeing Vincent and Daniel play basketball, and their college graduation three weeks ago. And he will miss seeing them unfold into a gifted actor/writer and doctor and whatever Alex chooses to be, respectively, As a final footnote, I was able to trace my father again in December of 2012. In another emotional phone call, I told him Mom had died the year before, and I wanted to see him again. He promptly hung up on me. So much for that side of the family tree.

My mother’s side is a totally different story. Silay City native Ramon Severino Conlu, a distant relative, took it upon himself years ago to trace our family tree as far back as humanly possible. This was before the advent of websites like Ancestry.com and others that help you find out more about your family history wtih as little information as possible. He has done a superhuman job, finding some branches of our lineage as far back as early Spanish times in the Philippines. I’ve tried to help him fill in the blanks on my side, which pretty much ended with me, my brother Luis and our sister Lizette.

I asked Primo Ramon if there were any known sportsmen in our family tree. He promptly responded with an initial list of names, including my own. 

The first name was Negros Occidental’s legendary golfer, the diminutive Luis Fernando “Golem” Cuenca Silverio. In a story that made the rounds of all the dailies in the Visayas in early March, Silverio was mentioned as the first Asian to play at The Masters and the first amateur to win the Philippine Open in 1966. His father Jose call him “Golem”, a Polish word which means big and robust, and also the name of the mythical wax giant which came to life to do good when its master carved a magical symbol onto its forehead. Golem played golf in the US, Mexico, Spain and Scotland, winning seven international titles. He never turned pro, because he believed he was playing for the love of the sport. Much of his memorabilia has been donated to museums in Bacolod.

Another name on the list was a more familiar one. I had known Carlos “Caloy” Garcia for years before I found out he was a cousin through his mother, Gloria. Caloy was, of course, a player in the PBL and the MBA’s Pangasinan Presidents before becoming a coach. He has since had a steadily advancing career in the PBA and NCAA, having been with the Rain or Shine franchise in between stints with the CSB Blazers and now the Letran Knights. When I see Caloy I am often reminded of the path my career could have taken had I not given up playing in the first. But that is another story.

It was also through Caloy’s side of the family that I found out that I had two cousins playing for the Philippine Azkals: Juan Luis “ Juani” Aldeguer Guirado and his brother, Angel Aldeguer Guirado. My maternal great grandmother Lagrimas Aldeguer Unson is our connection. Since a big part of our clan originated from Spain, much of our heritage has stayed there. Thanks to Caloy’s brother Rafa, who serves as their interpreter, the language difference is not a problem.

The biggest surprise on the list of Primo Ramon was the name Jeffrei Allan “Jeff” de la Peña Chan. I’ve covered some of Jeff’s games for FEU, and admired his growth as a player, especially as a contributor to Gilas Pilipinas’ most recent success. But then, I shouldn’t be surprised, since he hails from Bacolod. Jeff was drafted 17th overall by Red Bull in 2008, and has blossomed into one of the most reliable shooters in the PBA. It gives me a kick to know we share the same bloodline. 

Now for my contribution to Primo Ramon’s research. I’m also related to Antonio L. Aldeguer, the selfless, tireless businessman who founded ALA Promotions and has bred world champions like WBO titlist Donnie Nietes and Tiger Sabillo, and will probably have half a dozen more before he’s done. His son Michael has done a tremendous job taking their company to the next level and finding a strong television partner in ABS-CBN. It was a happy surprise that I had unearthed the connection a few years ago, again after having already known them for years through my profession. Along the same line, we’re connected to Dino Aldeguer, who played for De La Salle Green Archers and is the brother-in-law of basketball coach turned politician Binky Favis.

There are a few other names on the list, but I’m waiting for more nuggets of gold from Primo Ramon. It is quite eye-opening to learn that one person like me can have heritage that reaches through Spain, China, Germany, Ireland and the Philippines, and that I am both Ilonggo and Pangasinense. It has filled in a lot of the blanks for me, for which I am grateful. It has really been a Happy Easter.