Gender-bending global warming

Dear Mr. Groucho Macho,

I do understand your difficulty understanding how a temperature rise by a couple of degrees could send nations panicking. After all, you say you have lived in tropical climes most of your life and have seen that while indeed temperatures have gone up, it has never approached that of a disaster of global proportions. Maybe, as you always say, you just have to put your shirt up more and rally a train of yawns to foil the heat.

Never mind that over 600 scientists have cross-checked each other to produce a report early this year that clearly underlines the impending risks brought about by climate change in the report written by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC). Those scientists, you say, must be plagued with a serious case of attention-seeking disorder, or maybe looking for research grants and decided to intellectually conspire to fabricate a global environmental issue. You even often pique on Al Gore and the discrepancy in the carbon footprint he espouses and the carbon footprint he actually makes as if the gap between Al Gore’s advocacy and his lifestyle spelled the doom of the very reality of climate change.

Surely, the Earth has had its "hot moods" at certain times, as you said. You say that the claim of the IPCC finding that the warmth in the last 50 years is unusual compared to the last 1,300 years in recorded history is nothing to be worried about since there were people already living in various parts of the world then but hey, they have coped since we are still here. You do not think that it is important that 1,300 years ago, there were only 210 million people in the planet and that now there are almost seven billion living in every nook and cranny. I guess people are people to you, all the same, regardless of numbers and their economic ability to cope with climate change.

But I have a hunch that nothing could bring it closer than when it hits you right where it matters. Let me tell you about an Aussie named Lizzie. She was part of an experiment by scientists from two Australian universities, the University of Canberra and the Australian National University. This study was so interesting and so shall we say, life-changing for Lizzie and for science that it made its way into the prestigious Journal Science last April 20. By all accounts, Lizzie is genetically a "he" or rather, she was "Ziggie." Yup, Lizzie’s embryo showed that he was genetically male and previously known facts about his kind have shown that when his genes in the embryo spell a "he," then the eventual full-blown offspring would be a "he."

Well, somewhere along the line, Ziggie became a Lizzie when he was made to develop under temperatures between 34 and 37 degrees. In fact, ALL the genetically male embryos in the group subjected under temperatures 34-37 degrees Centigrade became females. In the control temperature of 28 degrees C, the ratio of both males and females developing into both was 1:1. As temperature increased, the researchers observed that there was an "increasing female bias, suggesting that temperature was overriding the genotypic sex in some males." Translation: the hotter the temperatures became, the more female the genetically male became.

You might be interested what this meant for Lizzie in terms of her looks. Well, she did have the male chromosomes but Lizzie looked like a female. One of the researchers, Dr. Alexander Quinn, in an interview in Livescience.com, observed that the high temperatures "prevented the male DNA triggering testis development" and that "by default, they developed instead as females with ovaries." You read right Mr. Groucho Macho! Ziggie developed ovaries.

Geez, you say, increasing temperatures could make my potential little Groucho Machos females? Well, I personally do not see anything wrong with that but I am professionally bound to say that you cannot make that leap just yet because Lizzie or rather, Ziggie, and the other Ziggies who became Lizzies in their group were Australian central bearded dragon lizards. They do not belong to the chromosomal group of your Groucho Macho species. Some women may dismiss this difference as just "detail" while emphasizing certain striking similarities that human males have with slithering reptiles, but that would not be science, would it? 

Scientists have always known that offspring of mammals and reptiles could either be genetically determined or environmentally determined (temperature) but never both until now. These scientists have been studying these creatures for the very purpose of finding out how global warming affects the gender distribution of species whose identity is determined by temperature. For these creatures, it would seem that the future belongs to females.

So Mr. Groucho Macho, as you brandish your uniqueness as a species, affirming that you are far from a bearded lizard and that you are immune from nature’s plans, you may want to cut down on your chest thumping and territorial guarding. And for the love of lizards, pull your shirt down.

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