Classmates

My first Christmas party this year was spent with my Assumption Convent high school classmates at Strumms in Makati (I must say it is the enclave of ’80s music, and it was filled with the faithful that night).

I seldom see most of them, but every time we are together I feel that I am in happy place — one that is carefree, secure and solid.

As Ronnie Henares and his band, (aptly called Mid-Life Crisis) were singing the sounds of the ’80s, my classmates took to the dancefloor like a pack of pre-teens raring to be grown-ups. What mid-life crisis?

The husbands (except for a few husbands and at least one boyfriend who bravely showed up) were home, the kids had been tutored for tomorrow’s assignments (some were actually late because they had to tutor their kids), deadlines were put on hold and cellphones put to silent mode.

Cocooned by a shared past (seven years in grade school and four in high school), we were in our own world that night. Like a session at the spa, a nightout with classmates is invigorating and therapeutic. It is also a sobering experience, because you do get some doses of reality — like a classmate getting hot flushes (oh my, are we getting there already?). You get free counseling — from marriage to cooking to investments. You laugh and laugh, even if the joke’s on you.

You also get to count your blessings and appreciate those who are blessings to you. Classmates have created a support group for a fellow classmate who needs their strength, and they meet up regularly; a classmate (guess who) misses being a parent because her only child has grown up to be so proudly independent; a classmate has just gotten her annulment and is dating someone she knew since high school, but who has re-appeared in her life only now; a classmate is nursing her sick husband back to health; a classmate has moved on after her breakup with her husband (“So many men, so little time” is said to be her complaint now) and another classmate has had enough of men, saying they stress her out.

Whatever it is, the classmates will meet again soon. Some of their stories will change. Some might find themselves in different sides of the wheel of fortune. But we will always care for each other because God put us in one place (the same school and the same classroom) at one very special time in our lives. A time when we saw more of each other than we did our own families.

We grew up together and we will grow older (not old!) together.

A Christmas Wish, A Christmas Story

On Saturday, Dec. 13, Martin Nievera will be bringing the Christmas spirit into your hearts (if you haven’t felt it already) with an intimate evening of his music and the inimitable artistry of musical director Homer Flores. Both world class artists will take center stage in a rare two-hour presentation of all-time favorites at 7 p.m. at South City Church in Alabang. 

“A Christmas Wish” is a benefit show for the Louie Tabuena Liver Foundation (LTLF). Louie Tabuena died on Nov. 23, 2005 of liver cancer. The LTLF is dedicated to help victims of the dreaded disease, specially infants and children, through funding and seminars. And there is nothing that Martin wouldn’t do for his Tito Louie and the foundation in his name.

You see, the connection between Martin and Louie Tabuena is one that brims with all the values of Christmas — unconditional love, kindness and forgiveness.

Martin, as most know, is the son of Louie’s former wife Conchita Razon with her second husband Bert Nievera. Yet Conchita’s children from her marriage to Louie all loved her children with Bert, and her children with Bert all loved the Tabuenas. Blood, after all, is thicker than water.

But many would have understood if Louie Tabuena was aloof or resentful towards Martin.

But amazingly, he was not. On the contrary, he loved Martin.

“Louie was like a second dad to Martin,” says Conchita. “That’s the truth also for Martin’s twin Vicki and their youngest sister, Rachel. But Martin was the closest to Louie. Louie went to every concert of Martin in Manila. And he was there ahead of anyone else.”

Tere Tabuena del Rosario, Louie and Conchita’s daughter, once told me that her dad would include Martin in family trips to Hong Kong and give the Concert King shopping money just like everybody else!

“It was God’s grace,” Conchita tells me. “And also that Louie was so generous with his forgiveness.”

You are amazing, I tell Conchita, for having created such harmony when there could have been bitterness.

“No, God is amazing!” exclaims Conchita.

So on Saturday, when you listen to Martin and let his music take you to heavenly heights, be swept away, too, by the unconditional love that is behind this concert. Love between a son and his late second father, love between siblings, and love for the less fortunate so that they may have something to wish for this Christmas.

(South City Church is located on the second level of Festival Mall, Alabang, right above National Book Store. For inquiries, please call The Louie Tabuena Liver Foundation at 826-5777 and 820-9330 or 0918-922-7102. Tickets for “A Christmas Wish” are limited.)

* * *

(You may e-mail me at [email protected])