Fissiparous Sara D.

Disclosure: The D does not stand for deranged or demented, but rather to the first letter of one of the most awesome political brands locally.

During a rambling long-promised two-hour press conference Friday (Oct. 18, 2024), a fractious and rather unhinged Vice President, Sara Z. Duterte, finally made official her fissiparous relations with President Ferdinand Romualdez Marcos Jr.

“I am not on cocaine, the room is just too cold,” she clarified to explain her use of a handkerchief and an army-grade metal drinking bottle. She frequently flicked her tongue like what lizards and snakes do when hunting for prey, or when hungry. She told the press corps she was hungry, at the end of her two-hour harangue.

Anyway, Friday’s presscon was the start of what could be a series of tete-a-tetes, tackling a number of personalities – from PRD (President Rodrigo Duterte), to “that guy” (President Marcos Jr.), to “Tamby,” short for Tambaloslos (Speaker Martin Romualdez) and somebody whose she name she refused to mention for the moment (the First Lady?), and issues – like “foreign policy, geopolitics.” And maybe, her waste of gargantuan confidential funds during her time as Davao mayor and a short stint as secretary of the Department of Education (DepEd)? Plus, her fear of being impeached by the House of Representatives under Mr. Tamby. Anyway, she would start from year 2021, she said of her telenovela.

“It’s nearing Christmas and prices are high. People cannot afford their spaghetti and mango float for Noche Buena,” Sara noted of the present, in Tagalog and English. She said:

“Alam niyo noon pag pumupunta kami sa 7-Eleven, expensive yan na tindahan di ba? Ay sorry 7-Eleven pero yes, expensive sila kasi ano sila, go-to mabilis ka makabili, nandun yung kailangan mo. P1,500 ko noon, nakabili na ako ng corned beef, nakabili na ako ng tinapay, nakabili na ako ng kung ano-ano. Ngayon, ang P1,500 ko tsokolate na lang mabili ko tsaka ice cream. Wala nang corned beef. Wala nang tinapay.”

With eyes rolling at times, an expressive mouth that at one point blurted out an expletive (“f**k you,” silent) and hand gestures that conveyed karate chops, wringing of the neck motion and straight slashing guillotine cut (she wanted, she said, to cut BBM’s neck for refusing to give his watch to a child graduate asking for it as a gift), she made a number of allegations.

One, Marcos Jr. would not have won without her support. “I was used,” she said. Two, Marcos Jr. is an incompetent president. “He had no platform,” she smirked. Her rating of him: on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the best or highest, just 1. “The country is going to hell, to perdition.” “Don’t drag me into it,” she pleaded, adding: “Wala man akong problema, huwag niyo na lang ako isali. Ako hanggang No. 2 lang ako, walang No. 1 ang Pilipinas ngayon. Kung meron man andaming No. 1 iba-ibang direksyon sila.”

Sara bristled with bitterness. “Kasi naman di ba, ang expectation mo pag tumakbo yung tao meron siyang sinasabi na gagawin niya and – pasensiya na, pero nakaupo ako at that time, hindi ako nakikinig sa kanya. Naririnig ko lang, sama-sama tayong babangon muli. Apparently, yun lang yung naririnig ko and when you say, sama-sama tayong babangon muli, you will do something to make this country the best that it can be. Kasi sama-sama tayong babangon muli, ibig sabihin walang maiiwan but apparently madami ang naiiwan ngayon. Yun lang naririnig ko nun.”

“Ang mali yata, nag-assume ako na when you say sama-sama tayong babangon muli, gagawa ka ng mga bagay para sa bayan at para sa taong bayan. Nag-assume ako na ang gagawin niya ay mas maganda pa, mas maayos pa, mas magaling pa sa lahat ng dumaan na presidente.”

Three, it seems she is the only one left doing good work in the government,

Fourth, she once told presidential ate Senator Imee Marcos “one of these days I’m gonna extricate your dad’s body and throw it into the West Philippine Sea!” That is if they don’t stop what she called the mega-million PR attacks against her and the ongoing House hearings on extrajudicial killings, illegal drugs, POGOs and her confidential funds. Sara said the presidential sister did not make any response to her threat to desecrate the dead.

The late Ferdinand Marcos Sr. was the most decorated hero of World War II, with no less than 27 medals, although later the American media questioned the authenticity of some of his war exploits. Marcos Sr. was imprisoned and tortured by the Japanese but managed to escape to lead a guerilla force, Maharlika, from 1942 to 1944. Major Marcos’ war exploits enabled him to top the 1959 senatorial elections despite being in the opposition party and win the presidency within six years in 1965. He would rule for 20 years.

In December 2022, Sara spent P125 million of confidential funds in just 11 days, half of which were holidays. At Thursday’s (Oct. 17) House committee hearing looking into DepEd funds under her, one document showed an underling withdrew P112 million in cash in just one day, showing nothing more than a petty cash voucher for it. Also, it was shown, from 2016 to 2022, as Davao mayor, Sara spent P2.7 billion in confidential funds.

Fifth, the VP was angered with what “Mr. Deception” (her word) said, “Maybe, I was deceived,” when President Marcos Jr. was asked by newsmen his reaction to Sara’s declaration, “We were never friends.”

*      *      *

Email: [email protected]