No dots just commas

People say never put a dot or an exclamation point on life, just commas. But after breaking a tooth on the last weekend of 2018 which also happens to have been rained out by Typhoon Usman, I’m perfectly fine with saying goodbye to 2018 today. After giving it some careful thought and listing down the highs and lows of 2018, the one word that describes it for me is “Challenging.” It was a year where resources and supplies were stretched at times. In terms of health, this was the year I had an additional three stents placed in my cardiac plumbing and was read the riot act by my beloved doctors at the Philippine Heart Center; Dr. Marlou Mendoza and the wizard Dr. James Ho. Then came the return to TV via Cignal TV’s OneNewsPh that doubled my workload while being a Volunteer Resource person for BMeg Feeds and my usual jobs as a mentor and trainer for communications and media engagements. And just when I was beginning to get the hang of things, the year ended in the tragic death of my friend Businessman Dominic Sytin who was shot in broad daylight inside SBMA. That kicked the Christmas cheer out of me.

Yes, 2018 was “Challenging” but it was also a yearlong series of wake up calls. Many people might be tempted to dwell on the difficulties, shortages, grief and the pain but as I reflect on it all I realize that the challenges and mini dramas were there to point out areas of weakness, stress, poor management or poor preparation. Some issues or irritants even became motivation for radical action or joint decision within our small family of three or us and the small team of workers who run our backyard farm. Even the violent loss of a dear friend placed emphasis on family and our relationship with God. As a whole, 2018 felt like one long slow mountain climb that stretched us, tested us and as we reach the finish line today, we do so with gratitude towards God and the many people who were there with us and for us.  We actually now have an appreciation of where we went wrong, what we did right and are already busy starting up on plans for our 2019 mission.

Because hindsight gives us perfect vision, we now see where we did not do quite well or actually let things go out of control. CONTROL is such a difficult but necessary term of life. I kept all the receipts but I never wrote the story of my spending habits and expenditures. We used to follow a personal accounting app where we would log our daily expense and because we did not do it well this year, we encountered shortages and lack in certain areas. Because we got “busy” with new things or other things, we lost control or did not even know what was going on in other areas of expense and maintenance. No matter how small these things maybe, when put together, they collectively result in big headaches or arguments.

The new rules for 2019 is daily accounting, monthly summary and analysis of expense areas so we can tell where there are possible leakages. No projects or hobbies and related expenses without estimates, budgets and approval. Reduce maintenance pits or things that eat up money for maintenance. If you can do it: Do It Yourself. If something will end up costing you more in the long run; financially, emotionally or time-wise, you might as well dump it, sell it even at a loss or give them away. As they say cut your losses now and end up saving money for later.

Many New Year’s resolutions will be about diets and weight loss or getting healthy in 2019. But I realized that many Filipinos don’t really take their health seriously, enough to start the year with a thorough medical check-up, a visit to a real eye clinic or eye doctor, and a dietician or a licensed nutritionist. They hesitate on spending money and taking time out from work. Ironically emergency medical intervention will land you in the hospital, require several doctors and procedures and probably a ton of money. If you’re not lucky enough, today’s costs for cremation, funeral services and burial or a crypt will be just as expensive and more damaging to your loved ones.

I was fortunate enough to have followed what doctors told me to do in 2018, did enough exercise, underwent both required and voluntary laboratory tests and I now get to live to tell it. If I didn’t I would have had a major heart attack round about June or July 2018. Instead I avoided it and had new three stents put in.  Because I went to an eye specialist, they were able to determine I had Glaucoma and managed to control the degeneration of my left eye or I would probably be seriously visually impaired by now. Listen to your body and pay attention to your body. Instead of conservative treatment be radical.

Finally, relish, nurture and enjoy the true relationships you have now, refresh the ones that were good in the past and be blessed and be a blessing to them. The untimely death of my friend pushed me into a myriad of situations, challenges and emotions that come up in midst of a sudden, unexpected and violent death of someone. By God’s grace I coped by caring for others. It’s really true what they say: if you are in deep pain or hurt, one good medicine is to look around you and care for others who are hurting more. You will soon realize that your pain, your hurt, or your loss is manageable as you manage those of others.

Yes, we faced challenges but they prepared us for what was and is to come in a good way. Happy New Year and God Bless!

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E-mail: utalk2ctalk@gmail.com

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