Roto-rooter required

By the time this article gets out to readers, I will probably be lying in an operating room at the Philippine Heart Center undergoing an angiogram, a procedure where they stick a humongous needle into a femoral artery up my groin, inject a dye which will light up my network of arteries, veins and whatever plumbing I have that circulates the blood in my body.

The intention would be to determine if all the years of eating bulalo, pork chops, Chicharon Bulaklak as well as smoking up until July 1991 has achieved its natural ability to deposit vile organic material that creates roadblocks in my blood delivery system. The fact that I flunked my stress test last Friday and that I am undergoing the angiogram indicate that the chances of there being one or two post election checkpoints in my arteries are possible. To remove any doubts about that, God even arranged a female doctor to explain matters to me. Yes, women are so intellectually honest they won’t even give you room for denial.

If the test confirms that parts of my arteries are as clogged as EDSA or C5 during the rush hour, I will then have the medical equivalent of a Roto-Rooter servicing which is who they call in the US to clear clogged drain pipes. Roto-Rooter sounds a lot more “chic” than our local Malabanan Septic tank scoopers.

I am trying my best to write all of these in a humorous “vein” but in truth this is the after effect of a 24-hour depression that set in after flunking my echo-stress tests. Apparently 3 decades of being away from any educational institution has not changed how I react every time I flunk a test regardless of whether it’s a math quiz or a cardiac stress test! I am normally a proactive – Charge of the Light Brigade type of patient. But I suppose the reality of having a heart related medical concern is far more serious and will hit home, and hit hard. As strong as your faith may be, when you are suddenly confronted with your mortality a flood of emotions pour in along with concerns for those you love and those who are depending on you.

There was not much I could do about the situation except go with the flow so I ordered all meat pizza realizing my days of junk food and native Lechon would soon be over. Just to zap the blues away, I singed my throat with a bowl full of Kimchi ramen hoping it would at least clear my nostrils if not my mind that was beginning to cloud over. Its amazing how spicy food can immediately put everything in perspective! Don’t expect any sympathy from your spouse in such a situation because my wife Karen immediately shut down the commissary and assured me that in terms of healthy diets; I haven’t seen nothing yet!”

Faced with such prospects I slyly arranged Sunday lunch with my mom for all the Japanese food I can eat and topped it of with rib-eye. Sorry but its all part of the human survival instinct to feast before the fast. In this case it will be a permanent fast!

My friends have tried to reassure me that the process, even an angioplasty would be painless. I smile, I thank them, and bite my tongue to stop myself from telling them your brain has obviously done an auto delete because they wouldn’t be doing it in an operating room if it was going to be fun and games! What is a shock, but comes as no surprise, is the number of friends I have who have undergone the process or are about to go through an angiogram. The number is a shock but I’m not surprised because many of them have actually eaten or smoked their way to an angiogram. The only blessing is that many of them are alive to tell their tale.

If you happen to be a veteran of such operations, please don’t tell people that it’s just like going to the dentist unless you know the history of the person’s dental agonies. When my wisdom teeth popped out they decided they wanted to go horizontal instead of vertical leading to a very painful experience with “impacted wisdom teeth”. Yes, I cried like a baby and you don’t want to see me do it again.

Aside from being concerned with the physical process and potential pain and risks, there is also the whopping cost involved especially if I end up needing an immediate Roto-rooter service called Angioplasty.

These procedures are not cheap and whatever money I managed to put away in the last two or three years will most likely reimburse a large part of the tuition fee of my attending physician in medical school. Based on estimates, the angiogram would cost P65,000+/+. Then to assault the first barricade would be 300K and the succeeding would be 100K. Suddenly I have flashbacks from the movie Les Miserables as they sang on top of the barricades just before they were massacred.

At this stage, you turn around and pray and hope that there won’t be any obstruction. But in hindsight, would that be any better?  I actually am very thankful to GOD Almighty that I am electing to undergo the procedure instead of having it after a heart attack or a stroke. By then the damage would be far greater and the costs far bigger. So in that sense the pain and situation I’m in is a gift in the form of an advanced warning.

In addition, I am undergoing a procedure that is now so commonplace and will be done within an institution that has so much knowledge and expertise on the matter. When my Dad had it in his mid-thirties he had his at the American Hospital near the Manila Cathedral and at a time when it was relatively uncommon. I also have a young physician, Dr. Marlou Mendoza whose sub-specialty are angiograms.

Strange as it sounds I am concerned on one side but excited on the other. Yes, we all want to be free of tests, trials and surgery. But I also can’t stop wondering what important purpose this process and experience serves aside from saving my life?  I can’t deny the fact that lately I have been noticing “signs and signals along the road” that is my life. I sense a calling to higher and deeper purpose. As of yet it is largely a maybe, and a puzzle. But during our Sunday service the word was about “Trusting God has a purpose in the midst of difficulty”. When I went to the text what jumped out was from Philippians chapter 1 verse 6: “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus”.

Whatever the outcome, allow me to say how much love I experienced in the spirit from all the friends and people who’ve been covering me, and my family in prayers. Thank you so much. Yes, it’s a beautiful life and I thank God for it!

To be continued….

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