Regrets from college

On the surface, many people would like to be able to say that they don’t have any regrets in life. Unfortunately you don’t have to dig deep to realize that we all have regrets in one form or another. Those regrets could be as monumental as walking out of a relationship, making a mistake that remains a mistake for life, or not doing something we should have, out of fear, ignorance, or sheer selfishness.

One of the gems that my father Louie Beltran gave me in terms of fatherly advise was about permanent mistakes; he shared how life allows people to make mistakes, but the one mistake we should avoid making are permanent mistakes that “we” can never correct. These are causing someone’s death or permanent injury out of recklessness, committing or being party to abortion, (and because I happened to be in the deep end of what people believed was a long shot and long distance relationship, he of course added) making the mistake of marrying the wrong person, because marriage is a lifetime commitment.

There are also “regrets” that we mistakenly carry through life, never ever realizing that some things were never meant to be until time and wisdom reveal the truth. For many years, I felt bad that I never officially made it to the Men’s Varsity Basketball Team of UP. I was always on the bench but never got to suit up. I blamed myself for not having the discipline, for not pushing myself more and for smoking. Once in a while I even blamed a coach or two. Through the years I learned to dismiss it or squash the thoughts every time it would sneak back into consciousness.

Only recently when I started seriously working out at CORE Kinesis did the pieces of the puzzle come together. During all the time I spent pushing and punishing myself for not making it to the team, I never really did give myself a break.

I never stopped to consider that I injured my hip in grade school and then in high school, as well as had a lumbo-sacral fusion at age 16, due to what doctors called ”floating” vertebrae. That spinal surgery laid me up in bed for three straight months. That I actually even got to participate in collegiate basketball was already a miracle, never occurred to me. Later in life I discovered I had a prolapsed mitral valve that affected the blood oxygen delivery to my body. That was also congenital and may have had something to do with my being born very premature. Almost two years ago I discovered that my left leg was shorter than my right leg, which also affected my gait, posture and caused back pains. Not exactly top class material for the hard court.

Nowadays, every one talks about amazing “handicapped” athletes who compete on blades, becoming surfing princesses and making ordinary people like me look like whiners. But the truth of the matter is, those “one of a kind” athletes are just that, they are one of a kind people made by God to inspire us. But just because they did it with one leg, no eyes or no arms, does not mean we should do no less. Aside from having our own very personal and physical limitations, many of us simply were not meant to be athletes, geniuses, millionaires or President. When a presidential candidate asked me straight up why he lost the elections, I gave him a straight up answer: “There is you and then there is God.” Instead of wallowing in the pool of regret, I’ve now come to appreciate what this “old body” of mine has managed to overcome and I’m now more the wiser not to regret what I was never intended to be.

On the other hand, there are things that we can still do something about. Last Friday, I was invited by BMeg feeds and The Philippine Veterinary Medicine Association to be a resource speaker, along with former Senator Dick Gordon at the PVMA’s Veterinary Empowerment and Ethical Lecture at the PICC.

In the course of the event, I discovered that like many such professionals, today’s veterinarians maybe well trained and equipped as far as their chosen expertise are concerned. But when it comes to “related matters” or “elective subjects” many professionals would not pass a panel interview or defense for their business model or knowledge in business and finance. Many new graduates are overwhelmed by “offers” to be employees, but the “option” and the thought of having their own business or clinic seems to be so far removed.

The point of “regret” here is the fact that colleges and universities have committed the mistake of labeling business related subjects as well as language and communications subjects as “electives” or options in a menu in order to fulfill the number of credits or units required for an undergraduate or graduate course. By labeling them as “electives” these very useful and important subjects end up sounding like UNIMPORTANT or the equivalent of meat extenders in a recipe. If Filipino professionals don’t know how to properly run a business, are poor in math and numbers, can’t communicate their business ideas, and don’t pay taxes, it is primarily out of ignorance which eventually turns into fear and ultimately flight.

Fortunately for many of us these once alien worlds of business concepts — marketing and languages — have become easier to connect to and understand. The “Idiot’s” series of self help books, Wikipedia and the dozens of monthly seminars conducted all over the country, now make it easier to catch up on the things we seriously need, but carelessly took for granted. Ignorance is something we should never regret. We should overcome it.