Sex and the City

Who do you relate to the most: Carrie, Charlotte, Miranda? Or are you more like the inexorable and unrelenting Samantha Jones? Though not a woman, I do tend to relate to all four characters, finding similarities to at least a few of their personal attributes. The long-running HBO series starring Sarah Jessica Parker has long since packed up their lights, cameras, and Manolo Blahniks, but I still enjoy watching some old episodes (plus the two movies) from time to time.

Don’t you and your friends relate to their spirited conversations, those that cover a whole range of personal issues the fashionable foursome try to thresh each time they gather for brunch, dinner, or cocktails? When my friends and I (all sets of friends) get together for some post-movie drinks or midnight snacks, love life, breakups, exes, singlehood, dead-end jobs are some of the most common topics. Sex and celibacy are definitely staples.

And speaking of sex, I just found out that a close girlfriend of mine—one who’d probably be a cross between Charlotte and Samantha (innocent-looking but is, as per Britney, ‘not that innocent’)—is a full-fledged ‘size queen!’ When she confessed to this preference for dimension, I was shaken to my core! I did not expect her, of all people, with her very wholesome image and decorous demeanor, to be so into size (I guess you’ll never know!). While many believe it affects performance and pleasure, I also hear a lot of women (and men) say size ultimately doesn’t matter—that love matters more. Oh well, to each his own.

She’s going to hate me for saying this but I feel this special predilection of hers has, to a considerable extent, crippled her actions. It’s made it difficult for her to move on from an extremely damaged relationship with a guy who obviously feels insecure of her achievements (he’s a high school dropout).

Thankfully, she’s found a new distraction—a guy who is more or less at par with her in terms of educational attainment and social status. Which brings me to another topic single women and even men discuss when it comes to prospective partnerships: family background and education. Do these things matter? For me they do, because even if it isn’t an issue for you, it could be for your prospective partner. Hence, it’s better to find someone who is secured of himself and his achievements. Then again, when it comes to love, we oft don’t get to choose who we fall in love with.

While we’re at it, a gay friend also often talks about wanting to settle down, about wanting to commit to a life of monogamy. But each time he meets someone and it starts to get serious, he always succeeds in shooting himself on the foot and finds a way to sabotage the relationship. He obviously doesn’t know what he wants yet, but then, who does? Most of the time, we think we know exactly what we aspire to achieve or have, only to realize when it’s finally within reach, it isn’t what makes us happy or content. At this point, discussions with friends become existential and philosophical.

At any rate, whatever your personal trials and travails, it’s always nice to have friends to share it with—to give us perspective, guidance, to knock some sense into us, and above all, to join us as we laugh at our own mistakes… and, as in the case of my close friend, her partiality to size. *naughty grin*

Here’s to life, sex, and the city! Cheers!

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Happy birthday to my dearest sister, Carmina Maria Anna “Minnie” Acebedo Lopez and brother-in-law Nico Sarte Celdran! Also, a very happy birthday to my dearest chums, Atty. Ida Marie Vega Escolano, Rose Angelie Pañares- Sanchez, and Joanna Marie Cuenco! All the very best to you guys on your special day and always!

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