Warped time

Three presidents have come and gone and one of the common things that people in Malacañang have seriously wanted to do was to replace the presidential plane.

To cut to the chase, the Philippine presidential plane is no Air Force One. If I were to nickname it, I would call it Air Flushed Once. Like a menopausal sex bomb, the aircraft make look fairly presentable, but you don’t want to be riding it when it has hot flashes and crashes.

The aircraft, which is a Fokker (F-28) is a close relative of the Philippine Monkey Eating Eagle, It has been around for so long and is now endangered!

Endangered, because unlike living creatures that have the capacity to generate muscles and has healing abilities, the presidential aircraft is made of alloy-steel materials, which after three or four presidents, is subject to metal fatigue.

The first concern of Malacanang advisers is that critics might lambast them or the President for even suggesting to buy a new plane. I would be more worried about the President riding on a death wish, rather than the idiots who wish he were dead, or maybe secretly hoping to send him off in a “Blaze of Glory”.

If anyone wants to challenge the idea of replacing the presidential “Tutubi”, Malacanang should invite the critics to a free trip to Coron where they can fully appreciate the view and their “spew” on board.

The updraft over Tagaytay will show the stability, penetrating clouds over Apo reef will provide the “chill” of flying, and landing and take off on Yulo King ranch will show off the vintage suspension of this true “Classic” aircraft.

 If anybody is serious about professional help, both Malacanang and potential critics, can go to the general aviation sector in NAIA as well as the veterans of the Philippine Air Force and ask them how safe and for how long and what limited conditions can the presidential plane fly in. Then we can all invite John Travolta to the Philippines since he really loves flying and buying planes. I wonder if his insurance company would even allow him to fly the P-Noy’s plane. 

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I have finally figured out why many of us live and operate on the basis of “Filipino Time”. It is not because we are habitual liars or socially dishonest, and it has nothing to do with traffic conditions or being fashionably late.

All that are merely excuses for a more sinister problem. The reason we can never get things done on time is because the Philippines as a whole, does not have one “official time”. We used to, but not anymore.

In the ’40s to the early ’70s, Filipinos were largely time conscious and having a timepiece was even part of the fashion and their wardrobe. Unfortunately, as progress came along and in spite of watches now being as big as belt buckles, not even Swiss accuracy could stand up to the emergence of “Filipino time”. 

The best time to prove this is during the “official” countdown to the New Year. The reason some barangays, towns or cities light up their fireworks too early is because they base it on someone’s timepiece or some clock on a prominent building.

If you do a survey inside your own home, it would be both interesting and humorous to discover how each clock in every room, every floor, as well as your appliances will display a different time. 

Even the clocks in your cars, cellphones, and computers will probably have a variation on the time. The difference could be as small as a minute to as bad as 15 minutes. If you happen to scan between radio stations you will surely wonder who has the right time and based on what?

There was a time when most people could call up the weather bureau and ask for the “correct time”. Back in the late ’60s and ’70s it was normal for newscasters and broadcasters to read the time based ONLY on the time given by the weather bureau. For those who watch TV, I remember that some channels posted the standard time on the lower left corner of the TV screen.

Unfortunately, the KBP has allowed its members to get away with giving time checks based on the Broadcaster’s timepiece or cellphone or battery operated wall clock that often lags behind every time its battery drains or there is a power fluctuation.

I remember when in the past you could set your activities just by clocking on flight departures. Some habitual radio listeners always knew when to get up, dress up or leave home base on the programs being aired on radio.

But that was then.

Newscasts no longer start “on time” and they certainly don’t end “on time”. Out of sheer laziness and lack of anyone or any group being “on guard”, we removed the concept and the word “Standard” from the term “Standard Time”.

Standard is suppose to be the basis, the reference point. Standard is suppose to be set and constant, not the ever-changing.

Sadly, if charity begins at home, so does tardiness. Because the country runs on “WARPED TIME”, so will the economy, business, government as well as the rest of our lives.

We all talk about discipline, respect for other peoples’ time, courtesy etc. But how can we ever get away from the curse called “Filipino Time” unless we set and observe a “Standard Time”?

We use Filipino Time as an excuse, because unconsciously we all know that no one really knows the time or has the right time. But if the nation operated on a standard time, we automatically have one major excuse taken away from us.

Because we run on Warped Time it is no surprise that it warps our values.

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