In the monotony of cleaning my small space, I thought about how freaked out a growing number of parents have become about their children failing in school and being “Kicked out”.
As a parent I understand the concern we all have about academic performance. But we also need to have our own alarm bells to warn us if we are simply being parents or are we being like “Lucy” in the Charlie Brown cartoon series.
Being “Lucy” is being concerned because we are concerned about “our” public image or what people might say about us as parents. Lucy often told Linus to do well in life because she did not want to be embarrassed with being “his” sister.
We should also avoid thinking and acting like “Investment parents” who sound like they are more concerned about the financial aspect of a child dropping out or repeating a school year than they are about the difficulty and trauma of the child. Your loss is real but your child’s loss is greater.
Unfortunately it is society that teaches us to think that if a child fails or can’t cope, the child is being lazy or rebellious. So we judge the child as “Lazy” or “Rebellious” rather than consider that the child is “confused”, “hurt”, or “challenged”.
Why should schools have the privilege of kicking out or “pass-out” a student they helped create and then wash their hands clean? They simply reinforce the mentality that it’s the child’s fault!
Just because we “told him a thousand times” or “done everything” does not make it so. If a child were deaf what would be the point of it? If a child is living with fear or intimidation, what difference would your warnings and threats make except add to his daily quota?
There was once a popular poster of a Gorilla scratching his head saying: “Just when I started to understand, they changed the rules”.
I was only beginning to understand arithmetic when Lourdes School Mandaluyong decided to introduce Algebra or what we call math. So like the Gorilla, I was mortally confused. When I failed to do my homework, I was told to stay out of the classroom or go to the Library, which meant each day was another day I fell behind.
Not only did the brilliant teacher make me more “stupid” by the day, he set me up to become a “liar” hiding homework from home. Eventually punishment included a ruler whacking my butt, because the brilliant teacher was concerned that my failure would be counted as his failure. The powerless often bears the greatest blame.
I went through life believing math was a “curse”. I took Math 11 seven times.
Only because a kind and wise “Terror Teacher” named Ms. (Fe?) Reyes of the UP Math department asked “Why?” and showed me “How”, did I eventually realize that Math was not a curse.
I was never that interested in school because school never seemed to be interested in me. You disappear in a class of 40, and many of my teachers made a special interest to make me disappear from the classroom. From Kindergarten on wards I was banished to the play on the swing, clean the blackboard, be the class runner or work as cheap labor in the workshop of technical schools.
God was kind. I ended up where I needed to be. I learned this from Doctor Mel Levine world-renowned expert on Child education and Multiple Intelligence. Dr. Levine assessed me as having Multiple Intelligence. The boy who had 5 things on his mind without being confused but did not have the discipline to focus and concentrate on one.
Education and mentoring is never easy but it does not need to be a nightmare. It has to be about the child or the student and not about us. My Dad Louie Beltran left his mark as a Journalist as well as a teacher who mentored many of the country’s leading Journalist and Broadcasters…. and then he got a college degree!
It’s not about time and diplomas. It’s about learning and being productive. That requires LOVE.
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Monotony can be the mother of inspiration.
Some of my friends ask how I can sit on a stool for hours doing the same thing over and over again. Often this involves “sanding down” or stripping paint from an old car or operating a grass cutter.
Actually the monotony allows the mind to drift and eventually open up to thoughts and ideas that would normally be bumped off by day-to-day concerns.
For instance, how many of you feel that your house or bedroom or office is small? To find out, try cleaning every inch and article in that “small space” by your self.
Go ahead, or are you too proud to do it?
Start with sweeping the floor. Then use a vacuum cleaner. Then get a damp cloth and wipe the walls, the floor, and use a “Japanese mop” to do the ceiling.
Don’t miss the furniture, equipment and accessories. Then take an old toothbrush and go back to clean all the cracks your rag couldn’t get into. Now you can finish up by polishing all the wood and the metal stuff. If you have curtains or blinds, might as well wash them…by yourself!
Since you’ve gone through every square inch of your small space, chances are you noticed rough spots that need repair, oiling, or touch up. So do it now.
By the time you’re done, you would have realized two things: Your small space is not so small when you have to clean it yourself.
The second thing you will learn is to appreciate the people who regularly keep your small space “clean”. Say thank you!