A group of men are drinking at a bar. One of them leaves the group and steps outside to use his mobile phone. He is shown calling someone and informing that person of his whereabouts. A giant beer bottle falls on him. He is not a “real” man.
A group of men see a woman in a bikini. They ogle her. One man comments that her bikini could be further improved if the colors and design are changed. A giant beer bottle falls on him. He is not a “real” man.
I saw the two television advertisements one after the other a few weeks ago. They were both selling a brand of strong beer that “real” men supposedly favor. I was aghast. It is 2009. I cannot believe that the beer company and its advertising agency continue to perpetuate the belief that a man who calls his loved one while out with his friends or who notices the design of a bikini more than the curves of the woman wearing it is not a “real” man.
In high school, my friends and I used to list down the qualities of our Dream Man during our idle time (or when we should have been listening to the teacher). We were idealistic and heavily influenced by the paperback romances that we bought second-hand at Music House. I remember writing that my Dream Man should be tall, dark, handsome, with animal magnetism, must know how to cook, must sweep me off my feet, and must love the outdoors.
My friends wrote similar things, only that they were more specific about whether he should have straight or curly hair and how tall he should be. We knew that our Dream Men were figments of our imagination and we conjured them because we were bored and had nothing better to do.
The television advertisements are similar in that they promote ideas of the Dream Man who drinks the strong beer. He is loud, likes to hang out with his friends, does not bother to inform the people who love him if he will be late, sees nothing but the woman’s body when he sees her in a bikini, wants his friends to think he is cool by acting like them. In short, a “real” man is a really insecure man.
The difference is that no one saw that our silly lists except us. The tv ads are seen by, and could heavily influence, gullible males, especially young and impressionable ones.
Gender-sensitivity training has been around forever that I almost thought it was passé. By this time, everyone should know that men and women come in different shapes and sizes and have all sorts of quirks. I guess the people who conceptualized the tv advertisements never learned. Or are stuck in a time warp. Or come from another planet.
Because of my shock at finding out that there are people who continue to have outdated beliefs about what “real” men are like, I am issuing this advisory: A man who is considerate to women and who appreciates fashion is a real man. Whether he like strong beer or not has nothing to do with how male he is. He does not even need to like beer to be a real man. Those who think that a real man has to be loud, needs to impress his friends, and drinks only strong beer live in a dream world. And need a course on gender-sensitivity.
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Email: lkemalilong@yahoo.com