Romancing Singapore

SINGAPORE — Here is one problem we won’t have for many years.

This Valentine week in the land that’s lacking in romance, the government is promoting dinners between eligible strangers, with supposed aphrodisiacs such as oysters and chocolate torte on the menu. It is also encouraging people to send romantic cards the old-fashioned way, by snail mail.

This country even has a special office, the Family Matters! Singapore Task Force, to encourage singles to marry and have children.

So far official schemes, such as financial incentives offered in 2000, have failed to boost the city-state’s birth rate, which in 2002 fell to a 14-year low of 40,800 — about 1.37 per woman in a population of just over three million.

Last year the birth rate hit an all-time low, with only 37,600 babies born.

The government is aiming for an annual minimum of 50,000 births. Singapore Prime Minister Goh Chok Tong, in a speech marking the start of the Year of the Monkey last month, once again prodded his compatriots to help address this national concern.

For once, however, I think Singaporeans aren’t cooperating with their government.

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The amorous Pinoy will tell any Singaporean control freak that if you have to order people to indulge in romance, you’re missing the point. But give the Singaporean government an A for effort.

"Romancing Singapore" is a yearlong program reminding citizens here, as it did in 2003, that "love is the little things."

Filipinos have known that for a long time, and we never had problems following the biblical admonition to go and multiply. Who foots the bill for raising the children? God will provide.

Singaporeans, on the other hand, see not the little things in love but the major headaches that can follow. The typical highly educated Singaporean woman is reluctant to become a stay-at-home mom. When both parents are working, who will wake up in the middle of the night to feed the baby? How much will it cost to send the kid to a good school? How will a child fit in an already cramped flat?

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Each time I visit this city-state the chaos of Manila looks even worse in comparison. And I wonder if we will ever have the discipline to turn our country into a place as clean and orderly as Singapore, where everything works and the rule of law prevails. Here public officials worry not about politics but about the falling birth rate.

When Singapore became an independent state in 1965 it was way behind the Philippines in terms of progress. Now Singapore is projecting itself as the Switzerland of the East and is even attaining enough confidence to loosen up socially. Chewing gum is now allowed. Visiting Boat Quay over the weekend, I was surprised to find a scantily clad woman dancing on stage to pounding music in a bar.

A Singaporean events coordinator told me the dancing started only six months ago. It was not a girlie bar, he emphasized; the dancer was there merely to lure customers.

Singapore is also trying to position itself as an Asian cultural mecca, sponsoring art exhibits, stage plays and concerts. On Valentine’s Day it will be the venue for the MTV Asia Awards 2004 hosted by Michelle Branch and F4’s Vanness Wu. Among those in the running for Favorite Artist is our very own Rivermaya.

The nightlife here is still slow compared with Bangkok or even Manila, and if you need a cab you need to look for a taxi stand and wait your turn in what is often a long queue.

But you can walk the streets late at night without worrying about getting mugged. And after that long line at the taxi stand, you are at least sure of reaching your hotel quickly and without fear of being robbed by the driver. If there’s no cab the subway is very efficient, clean and safe.

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That kind of efficiency and cleanliness can come only when discipline becomes part of the national psyche. Sadly, the guy who tried to drum that into the Pinoy head went about it the wrong way. So to this day we still say "discipline" with a sneer, recalling dictator Ferdinand Marcos’ martial law slogan: Sa ikauunlad ng bayan, disiplina ang kailangan (For the nation’s progress, discipline is needed).

We remember his idea of discipline: banning long hair for men and mini skirts for girls, and arresting all his political enemies. And we remember that the first thing Marcos forgot was to discipline himself and his wife the shoe lady.

After that tragic attempt at national discipline, we were only too happy to revert to anarchy.

Singapore, on the other hand, embraced the benevolent authoritarianism of its founding father Lee Kuan Yew, whose wife was no obsessed collector of shoes or flashy jewelry. Confucian values helped the new nation along, just as long-held codes of honor and discipline fueled Japan’s unprecedented post-war economic surge.

There are no similar values or codes of honor in the Philippines. Our people lack the discipline to queue up for anything or even hang on long enough to their cigarette butts until they can find a proper receptacle to discard it.

We’re happy with our fiestas and processions, in seeking forgiveness for our sins every week, and especially in going out and multiplying.

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Discipline, however, also has its pitfalls. State control can stifle creativity. There’s a thin line between cleanliness and prissiness. All that discipline can be boring. At a certain point, even success can be boring. The Singaporean government got it right: there’s more to life than money and a successful career. But Singaporeans may not be sure exactly what’s missing in their life.

The Singaporean events coordinator told me he and his wife always enjoyed visiting the Philippines because people always seemed so relaxed and happy and sang a lot wherever they went.

Our government need not worry about having to offer free trips abroad for those who decide to marry. It need not bother putting together romantic packages on Valentine’s Day, as Singapore is doing with the "Love Express" at the Night Safari (about P10,560 net per couple) and the love bird watching at the Jurong BirdPark (open despite bird flu; just look, don’t touch the birds).

And yet, seeing how much Singapore has achieved in just four decades, you can’t help wishing that we had even a bit of the discipline that has propelled this city-state.