The above title is the title of a book written by Kathleen Noble, Ph.D., which is lifted from a poem by Elinor Wylie entitled Madman's Song. The excerpt goes: "Better to see your cheek grown hollow/Better to see your temple torn/Than to forget to follow, follow/After the sound of a silver horn."
The poignant message of following the sound of a silver horn is for women to create a "new hero myth," which, Noble writes, "teaches us (women) to claim, not suppress, the power of our femininity and to perceive ourselves as the heroes of our own lives and the authors of our stories." Noble quotes Carolyn Heilbrun as saying this need for a hero myth should inspire us women "to take risks, to make noise, to be courageous, to become unpopular." At the heart of this "heroic quest," says Noble, is a woman's "desire to exercise her own will and to be her most authentic self."
This heroic quest had been inspired, or forced, as you may, by the absence of female heroes (Noble uses the term "female heroes," not heroines) in medieval legends such as El Cid and King Arthur and contemporary stories of Batman and Bruce Lee. These archetypal heroes, writes Noble, "are usually successful warriors who display superior strength and courage, or men who wield social, political, or spiritual power. The hero gives shape to himself, and he lives life on his own terms regardless of cost." The male hero is defined in terms of his quest. In contrast, a heroine typically is defined by her gender or support roles. From ancient times, the heroine has been drawn as a gentle, quiet and unassuming female, obedient to the authority of fathers, husbands or brothers, and if she defies this "natural order," she is castigated as a dangerous, unfeminine, and a contemptible being whose actions will lead to the destruction of society and universal chaos. "Think of the tragic fates of Medea, Joan of Arc, and the many women who were banished if not censured for favoring family planning and universal suffrage, education, health care, and reproductive control. In contemporary times, most women who participate in contemporary projects, it is in supportive roles, like Lois Lane as an observer/photographer, and April O'Neal in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
The examples of heroic women are numerous. They attest to the fact that from the beginning of recorded history a great many women -- in their own ways and in their own times -- engaged with life in the time-honored tradition of the hero." These women were not isolated "geniuses," though some were more capable than others, but most of them were "ordinary women who brought about extraordinary changes in the status quo in strikingly similar ways."
Noble interviewed scores of women from all walks of life, races, and religions, who had engaged in their heroic quest to pursue their potentials and possibilities. The heroic quest, as Noble defines it, "is a journey upon which every woman is embarked wherever she is in her life at whatever moment, even though she may not recognize her life as such."
I expected her female heroes to be outstanding women in their fields, but in fact, most were seemingly non-extraordinary women who made their journeys into self-discovery and fulfillment after hurdling personal struggles within the family, making career shifts, and understanding their shortcomings out of their gifts of sheer will and determination. Noble herself decided to leave her wealthy but emotionally repressive family, take on a series of vocations and relationships and finally settle on what made her whole and content. Her models are a nurse from the Philippines, an intelligent Lebanese surviving the trauma of civil war in her country, a woman who felt freed upon her self-acceptance of her being a lesbian, a secretary who entered a professional training program in social work, and many others.
In the heroic quest, each woman goes through the awakening process, or initiation, in which, through their capabilities and hidden strengths, they slay a series of formidable obstacles or "dragons. The first dragon is her own self," in which she looks into "the depths of herself," and not return to "the familiarity and ignorance of her former life." The next is depression, the third, dependence and enclosure that waits for someone else to provide a solution, and makes the quester settle for a life of safety, passivity and acquiescence to the status quo.
The fourth dragon along the heroic journey is the hydra-headed-demon of prejudice -- through culture and traditions -- which restraints women from fulfilling their potential because they are female. The fifth dragon is saying yes to too many expectations and demands, often at the expense of the quester's physical, psychological, and spiritual well-being. The sixth is unexpected hardship and loss, which when hurdled moves the quester beyond passivity, bitterness, grief, and despair to acceptance, transformation, and wholeness.
The quester will need allies -- friends, professors, relatives, even a stranger -- "to keep alive her spirit, her individuality, and her innermost hopes and dreams, especially if she finds herself in difficult or adverse circumstances. They build a psychological bridge for her to walk across when she feels strong enough to accept the challenge of awakening and to leave her old life behind."
Then comes the process of transformation which brings the quester to "a new level of wholeness and integration, but not for herself alone... (For) the ultimate aim of the heroic quest must be neither release nor ecstasy for oneself but the wisdom and power to serve others."
The "quest," is really a misnomer, says Noble. "Because just as there is no one quester, there is no one quest. The silver horn sounds at many points throughout our lives, challenging whatever holds us in thrall, awakening our great possibilities and desires, inviting us to go where we have never gone before... And the more determined a woman is to grow, the more calls to adventure she is certain to receive."
(My deep thanks to Lorna K. Tirol for lending me Noble's book.)