14 of the most unbelievable epitaphs
MANILA, Philippines — Loved ones of the departed around the world have inscribed the most unbelievable and original phrases on tombstones to remember the life of the dead.
Some wrote down verses in rhyme, while others lifted quotes from famous people. Others—especially those who have earned famed during their lifetime—choose words associated with a deceased celebrity.
Here are some of the most original epitaphs ever reported:
Rhyme
She was not smart, she was not fair,
But hearts with grief for her are swellin';
All empty stands her little chair:
She died of eatin' water-mellon.
- origin unknown
Here lie the bones of Joseph Jones
Who ate while he was able.
But once overfed, he dropt down dead
And fell beneath the table.
When from the tomb, to meet his doom,
He arises amidst sinners.
Since he must dwell in heaven or hell,
Take him - whichever gives the best dinners.
- in Falkirk, England 1690
Opened my eyes, took a peep;
Didn't like it, went to sleep.
- on a baby's grave, Lake Mills Cemetery, Wisconsin
Personality
Gone underground for good.
- on a coal-miner's grave
Sir John Strange.
Here lies an honest lawyer.
And that is Strange.
- on a respected lawyer in England
Going! Going!! Gone!!!
- Jedediah Goodwin, auctioneer, 1828 to 1876
See. I told you.
I was SICK!
- on a hypochondriac's grave, Littleton, Colorado
Legacy
Workers of all lands unite!
The philosophers have only interpreted the world in various ways; the point is to change it.
- Karl Marx, Father of Communism, died 1883
The best is yet to come.
- Frank Sinatra, singer, 1998
She did it the hard way.
- Bette Davis, actress, 1989
I am ready to meet my Maker.
Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.
- Winston Churchill, statesman, 1965
A tomb now suffices him for whom the world was not enough.
- Alexander the Great, conqueror, 323 BC
Free at last. Free at last. Thank God Almighty I'm free at last.
- Martin Luther King Jr., African-American civil rights movement leader
I told you so, you damned fools.
- HG Wells, novelist
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