How to host the dumbest x greatest party of your life

MANILA, Philippines - Blame it on a breakup, or disappointment, or whatever existential crisis it is you’re going through. Are all your corpie friends falling by the wayside? Cue Blink 182: “Miss you, miss you.” Are you alone for the most part during the holidays since everyone else seems to be coupled up and (see: Facebook status) IN A RELATIONSHIP? Cue Adele: “I wish nothing but the best for you two.” Have you found yourself in a scenic and cultural rut? Cue The Wanted: “How do you get up from an all-time low?”

In my case, it took a day trip to Brooklyn (a.k.a. “hipster central”) with a newfound hipster friend to bounce back from proverbial rock bottom and arrive at that awe-inspiring light bulb moment. “OMG! Let’s throw a hipster party when we get back to Manila! Just for fun;” to which my friend replied, “Game!” Cue Ellie Goulding: “Let’s make it happen! Yes, anything can happen.” Seemingly, the “stars” aligned (pun intended) and the pieces organically fell into place.

A few excited calls here and there to friends and then-acquaintances led to a random, hipster-themed house party that some friends and I threw out of holiday boredom and goodwill. A calamity had struck the country around that time; and so we decided to put door charge and donate all proceeds of the event to the ongoing relief operations for the victims. It was there that the esprit de corps of our hipster-themed three-peat arose — inviting anyone and everyone who was willing to camp it up to not be afraid to let loose and look stupid on camera, and party for a cause.

While the hipster parties had long ended and the starships had inevitably flown (it came in the proverbial threes), I started to reminisce on how the craziness began (I can’t believe it’s been a year since it happened); and then channel our experiences so YOU can throw you own “hipster themed” house party this merry month of December.

Hopefully years from now, you can look back at your Facebook photos (FB, please don’t shut down. RIP Multiply), and be amazed by how you managed to raise a big f**k you to the saying “the youth is always wasted on the young,” and partied like there’s no tomorrow.

STEP 1: Get some crazy, like-minded friends together and decide on a theme for your party. It can be anything from Heritage Americana, to the Summer of Love, to Space Cowboys vs. Neon Indians. Seriously man, anything goes; though personally, the more “ironic” it is, the better.

STEP 2: Finalize a venue (a friend’s house is always preferable since people take well to partying when the setting is informal) and then work on an overall theme. It helps to have a kick-ass, tag-team of Lana del Ray-worshipping hubaderas doing double-duty on prod design. With a well-curated environment, your party pictures are sure to look a thousand times better, and you, a thousand times hotter. #BOOKIT

STEP 3: Brainstorm a few ridiculous puns for the refreshments you’re serving. Do it at Hooter’s or at some random night out at Jamba Juice. The most unusual places are sure to stimulate your “pun-iness” and creativity. How about some “Hotdog Days Are Over” for your mini Tender Juicy hotdogs? Or “Lykke Li-chon” for prichon? Or some mind-blowing “Moonleaf MGM-Tea” or “Florence and the Burger Machine” for your pop cultural satisfaction? It’s all about the wit and comedy, really.

STEP 4: Load up on tons of libations. Perhaps some pale, or shooters, or mixers courtesy of a fun-loving pirate prototype? Along the same vein, it would be cool to come up with witty names for the drinks you’re serving as well. Like “Erykah Ba-durian candy,” they are great conversation starters. Try “Rum Coke-chella” or the even more hipster, “De-Vodka Bandhart.”

STEP 5: Decide on a DJ lineup. After all, a hipster house party is only as good as the music that’s playing. Get an indie bro and a hip-hop bro to do back-to-back dance blowouts, and then a hipster duo for the anthemic sing-along, splicing in some Donna Cruz in between those Call Me Maybes and Gangnam Styles. It’s all for the sake of fun, really. And if everyone’s having fun, your DJs will also have fun and escalate the good times even further.

STEP 6: Throwing hipster house parties is all about the ridiculousness of actually going through the motions of throwing one. What better way to remember these dog days of your life than to see it immortalized and captured Cobrasnake-style in social media. Round up your talented photographer friends to get in on the essence of “Deathcab for Barbecue-tie,” do a “photo booth,” and shutterbug the night away.

STEP 7: Get a gimmick. It’s all about your house party’s unique selling proposition. It can be as simple as a photo wall made of karton for some bodega chic, a trampoline, some kiddie pools, and the motherload — a friggin’ mechanical bull. Seriously, who thinks of this sh*t? Ha ha!

STEP 8: Promote your party through Facebook and the usual social media tools, and make sure that all your hard work pays off with a good turnout. Well, even if it doesn’t really hit the mark, it’s really about the quality over quantity.

STEP 9: Gear up. Have fun. And let the good times roll.

STEP 10: But remember, don’t take yourself or the party too seriously. Hello, it’s a hipster party after all. #YOLO = You only live once. #YOYO = You’re only young once.