Lost in the NBA

October to the sensible man should mean only two things. One, it’s the month that the new season of Lost premieres. Two, the NBA season is about to start. All other things come in third.

Lost and the NBA have one thing in common that is vital to their success, and that’s team chemistry. Lost is a massive TV hit because its ensemble cast does an amazing job. NBA teams that win championships have the same quality. Lost has unique individuals, each with his or her own back-story, own idiosyncrasies, own strengths and own weaknesses. An NBA team has to deal with the same things with its players.

With this in mind, I came up with my very own Lost Awards for NBA players. The criteria are simple. Each award will go to the player who: a) exhibits the most likeness to a certain Lost character, and b) will help his team with these characteristics. And since both Lost and the NBA are barely underway (Lost just aired its first episode, the NBA is still in preseason), this will also serve as a mini season preview.

THE HURLEY REYES AWARD. The Hurley Reyes Award goes to the NBA player who seems like a goofy guy, looks like he’s out of shape, has had some bad luck in the past, but suddenly hits the jackpot.

Winner: Antoine Walker. There isn’t a goofier move in basketball than ‘Toine’s shimmy. Walker has always been perceived as bad luck, as he was traded by Boston, Dallas, Atlanta then Boston again before hitting the jackpot by landing with Dwyane Wade and Shaquille O’Neal in Miami. Now he’s a key player on the defending champs, and one of the guys that keeps them together. I expect Hurley (after escaping) and Antoine Walker (with Shaq’s declining productivity) to both play bigger parts this season.

THE JOHN LOCKE AWARD. This award goes to the player who proved everybody who doubted him wrong. The John Locke Award also entails being creepy and bald.

Winner: Charlie Villanueva. Villanueva was a much-maligned draft pick of the Toronto Raptors last year but he ended up being one of the best rookies in the league, even scoring 48 points in one game. This year Villanueva is on a new team, the Milwaukee Bucks, and looks to silence any critics he has left.

THE KATE AUSTEN AWARD. This is awarded to the player who always looks pretty even though he’s in the ugliest situations. This award does not require the player to be torn between two guys.

Winner: Paul Pierce, who probably had his best season last year (27 points, seven rebounds and five assists per game) even though he was playing alongside guys like Ryan Gomes and Kendrick Perkins. Pierce seems to have accepted the fact that he won’t be winning much for a while and is bringing his A-game anyway. Pierce will probably continue his MVP-type numbers from last year. Plus he has a little more help with the arrival of Sebastian Telfair and Theo Ratliff.

THE JAMES "SAWYER" FORD AWARD. The Sawyer Award is given to the player who nobody likes, but he gets the job done anyway. He’s everyone’s favorite target, but he’s also the biggest reason why his team is successful.

Winner: Kobe Bryant. Kobe will always be the person everyone loves to hate, and a lot of that is because of how good he is. He does a lot to the detriment of his team. He doesn’t pass enough, he doesn’t lead enough, he shoots too much and so on. But nobody doubts that the Lakers would be nothing without Kobe, much like nobody doubts that Lost wouldn’t be a hit without Sawyer. This season, Kobe will probably do more of the same. He has some new people around him, but Kobe’s Kobe. For them to be successful, that’s all he has to be.

THE JACK SHEPARD AWARD. The Jack Shepard is awarded to the player who has an almost obsessive need to help his teammates. He’s a leader and is constantly being tested.

Winner: Steve Nash. Who else but the MVP himself? Nash is like a spinal surgeon with the basketball. His precision and selflessness make him the quintessential point guard. He’s the guy you want on the court with the ball in his hands, much like Dr. Jack is the one you want attending to people on a deserted island. He’s the guy you put your faith in. This season, Phoenix, with or without Amare Stoudemire, is once again on Nash’s shoulders.

Other Awards:

Mr. Eko Award (For being big, black and Christ-centered): Dwight Howard

Sun Kwon Award (For not speaking English at first, then finally having the stones to): Yao Ming

Charlie Pace Award (For being a former drug user trying to set things straight): Shawn Kemp

Sayid Jarrah Award (For unjustly being a racial stereotype): Dirk Nowitzki