A quote about family from Joyce Brothers rings so true: "When you look at your life, the greatest happinesses are family happinesses." A painful experience during the holidays reminded me that love of a family is the best gift of all.
Plans for a holiday vacation to Singapore got canceled at the last minute. This vacation was set to enable my husband and I to reunite with my daughter, Marielle, who currently works in Melbourne. She picked Singapore as our meet-up place.
On December 22, while on my way to the bank to prepare our dollars for the trip, I felt this excruciating pain in my middle abdomen, which landed me in the emergency room. The final diagnosis: Chronic calculus cholecystitis with choledocholithiasis. I told my eldest daughter to proceed as planned so that Marielle would have an immediate family member on Christmas day. Reeling in pain, I focused on getting well but at the same time felt a tug in my heart that our family won't be together on Christmas for the first time. The good news though is my surgery pulled through with no further complications.
My recuperation didn’t stop me from celebrating Christmas. The little Christmas tree and pretty red and green-wrapped Christmas presents on my table brought color to the cold and sterile room. The wonders of technology transported Lauren and Marielle into our hearts shortly before Christmas day as we unwrapped our gifts together. Skype brought a new level in Christmas traditions for those unable to spend Christmas together like my family and it made it even more special. Even if we were not physically together, I felt the love and spirit of Christmas. I was happy and contented, eager to get well enough to be discharged from the hospital.
My thoughts often raced on "what could have been" and "should have been." In my mind, I envisioned my family walking down Orchard Road, eating all sorts of Malaysian, Indonesian, Indian and Chinese cuisines at the Hawker Centres or shopping to our heart's delight. My husband often assured me there will be more family vacations so to “just get well.” I kept my optimism high, letting only positivity reign my life and focused on my recovery.
As I was doing my usual boring routine on my hospital bed, a knock on the door piqued my curiosity. Who could be my visitor? What a sweet surprise to see Marielle, standing by the door. Two months have elapsed since we last saw each other so it was wonderful to be together again even for just two days. I cried when she left two months ago. I was overwhelmed with joy as we hugged each other.
With a little red box in her hand, she handed her gift to me and excitedly told me to unwrap it. Inside the little red box was a quaint handmade pendant in porcelain, designed by an artist in Melbourne. Beautiful, but even more beautiful was my daughter’s surprise visit. There she stood, my lovely daughter’s physical presence, the surprise gift from my husband. Totally unexpected.
Family life will always consist of major and minor crises. My family survived through a major crisis, the unimaginable pain from the death of my beloved son and the roller-coaster grief journey that went along with it. There will be the ups and downs of health, success and failure in career, marriage, and all kinds of issues. My surgery reminded me that there is always something to be thankful for each day. God and family and always top my gratitude list. God, for giving me the courage to keep on going even if hope seems dismal. Family, because they are God's gift to me, as I am to them.
I learned the magical lesson that making the most of what I have turns it into more. It is not material gifts that make me happy. It is love.