Do you believe in world peace? And other dumb questions

MANILA, Philippines - Idon’t think beauty queens are stupid. Having met, worked, and had several drinks with quite a few, I think they really are the strong, independent, and intelligent women they are presented to be. They are also fully capable of kicking my ass should I say otherwise.

I’m admittedly not staunchly against what hardcore feminists would call the objectification of women that occurs at beauty pageants. True, I’d sooner stab my eye with a fork than give people the license to outright compare my bikini-clad body to that of other women, but then again these pageants have always been completely honest about their intentions. And while pageantry is certainly not my cup of tea, I don’t see why a woman shouldn’t set out to achieve her peak in terms of appearance. Actively developing your mental, emotional, and spiritual prowess is no excuse to leave the other parts of you behind. As I like to say, kung hindi mo itotodo ang pagkatao mo, ‘wag na.

I am not one to dismiss the cultivation of beauty as shallow. Whenever I encounter someone who self-righteously thinks that having substance, cause, and intellect is enough reason to walk around looking like he hasn’t taken a bath in days, I sigh pityingly. I’m convinced that people miss out whenever they dismiss things such as style, charisma, je ne sais quoi, presence, and even the way one walks as mere “fluff.” And then when they are overlooked for people who took it upon themselves to work the appeal and presentation, they complain that it’s unfair. Suffice it to say that I’m glad that we have industries that devote themselves to — and in the process remind the rest of us — of how arresting, and therefore crucial, “fluff” is.

Q&A Cringe fest

The question and answer portions, however, feel like instituted compensations and apologies for how pageants put a premium on the physical. And they’re really sucky ones, too.  The one segment in the competition where the contestants are supposed to give the audience and the judges a piece of their brains (at least in theory), they’re asked something that seems to have been lifted from a slumbook. “What’s one bad habit that you’d like to break?”

I don’t know, but especially in the case of Bb. Pilipinas and Miss Universe, if someone encouraged me to run for a position that would give me a national/international platform to advocate causes and inspire change — and then proceeded to test my eligibility with questions like, “Are the best things in life truly free?” I’d genuinely begin to think that I was being scammed, not to mention I’d feel insulted. Please stop talking to me like I’m Barbie.

It’s easy to judge the cringe-worthy answers and conclude that, “Yes, apparently you were talking to Barbie.” But I think most of us forget that the ability to answer an unforeseen question on the spot, in front of countless people who are just waiting for their cue to scrutinize, is more of a specialized skill than a reliable gauge of intelligence that can be applied to many. I can empathize with this because I joined an impromptu speech competition in fourth grade, and later tried for the debate team in college — a feat, which involved drafting seven-minute speeches in 15 minutes about politics, international relations, sports, medical, and gender issues. I was once asked whether Iran should be allowed to develop their own nuclear energy when I hadn’t the slightest background on the country.

I failed miserably at both endeavors and am now a writer who enjoys the luxury of having hours and days to gather what I want to say. Janine Tugonon, on the other hand, was clearly a pro. When interviewed for Supreme’s Jan. 12 cover this year, she answered everything off the bat substantially and without pause, while simultaneously attending to the hazardous task of styling her own hair with a curling iron.

On time constraints and a woman’s true power

As for the ladies who fail to hack it, it’s humanly impossible to resist the urge to laugh and make snarky tweets about them, but we should at least keep in mind that just because someone doesn’t have the quickest of wits, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re airheads. If you’ve ever left a heated, spit-for-spit argument haunted by all the more clever things you should have said instead, that should give you a starting idea of how these beauty queens must feel after their blonde moments are irretrievably aired and replayed a million times after on YouTube. And perhaps it is also due to the extremely tight time constraints that the questions are mostly kept on the level of, “Is love truly all that we need?”

I think the “beauty” part of these pageants is ironically what is still very relevant today because we still live in a world where appearances, presentation, and personal aesthetics matter, and where, let’s face it, it’s still so much fun to be a girl. The apologetic attempts at topical and feel-good substance, however, are what I feel leave a bad taste in the mouth. They absolutely fail to reflect what women today are capable of ruthlessly tackling, and at what depth. I’ll admit that I don’t have any alternatives to propose what would fit into the pageant format, save perhaps for asking better but still manageable questions (I personally loved Gloria Diaz for asking if it’s possible to believe in the RH Bill and be a good Catholic. Yan ang matinong tanong!). And maybe there was never meant to be one. After all, a woman’s true power and influence can only be properly manifested through time, in the day-to-day, and in the gradual but actual change that she is able to affect throughout her existence.

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