Best of the Week: Anti-planking, pro-veganism and Miss World Philippines!
MANILA, Philippines - Winner of the Week: Floyd Mayweather Jr.
Boxing’s favorite trash talker won the WBC Welterweight title this week from Victor Ortiz in a controversial match where analysts claim Mayweather threw in a barrage of punches to Ortiz when he wasn’t ready yet. Mayweather answered the allegations of dirty play by saying the rule of boxing is to “protect yourself at all times.” Same goes for casual sex.
Repeal of the Week: Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell
No, it’s not a showbiz talk show title; it used to be a military policy, and we’re glad that it is no longer in effect. Openly gay men and women can now serve in the US military without any reservations or prohibitions after the DADT law from the Clinton era was finally repealed this week. If the Al Qaeda wants war, American soldiers will give them war, and they’ll be there in their red stilettos.
Lebanese of the Week: Nora Aunor
In a magazine interview that’s now out in newsstands, returning superstar Nora Aunor reveals she brought archrival Vilma Santos a bouquet of roses during their heyday, hinting she may be bisexual. “Baka nga gano’n ako. Kung gano’n ako, masaya pa rin, di ba?” she tells us. We answer, “Identity crisis at 58, meganon?”
Important Legislation of the Week: The Anti-Planking Act of 2011
RH bill and FOI can wait, this is a very important bill that needs to be passed even before the President loses another hair strand. Rep. Winnie Castelo of Quezon City filed this week the Anti-Planking Act of 2011, an act prohibiting and penalizing planking during street rallies. He says it’s the parent in him that prompted him to file the bill, while the plankers in us feel this is crazy. Good thing there’s horsemaning and owling.
Beauty Pageant of the Week: Miss World Philippines
The inaugural Miss World Philippines was held this week, and Filipino-French model Gwendolyn Ruais was adjudged as the first title holder. She will be representing the Philippines in the Miss World 2011 pageant in London in November, where former PBB housemate Riza Santos is also competing, representing Canada. According to rumors, Miss Philippines will have an interpreter for the final question, and Shamcey Supsup was offered the position.
Government Agency of the Week: MMDA
Gone are the days when MMDA is in equal footing with the images of COA, Customs and BIR. Nowadays, it isn’t corruption that’s attached to MMDA’s image, it’s technology! MMDA has recently released it’s iPhone/iPad app, which gives real time traffic info from the Metro’s main roads, making it a must have app for every commuter. Their next project will be eTickets, apprehending violators via Facebook.
Porn Site of the Week: peta.xxx
It’s now all systems go for www.peta.xxx, a porn-cum-vegetarian website created by the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals or PETA. The website is expected to be replete with sexual content and graphic animal suffering, in an effort to raise awareness on brutality against animals. This move was criticized by anti-sexism groups, calling the strategy desperate and sexist. Asked to comment on this, Melanie Marquez maintains she will still eat meat; hence, “I am a carnival.”
Pambatong Movie of the Week: ‘Ang Babae sa Septic Tank’
Fans of the elevator acting style, rejoice! Marlon Rivera’s lol-tastic comedy Ang Babae sa Septic Tank has been chosen to represent the country in the Foreign Language Film category of the 2012 Academy Awards. They need about P30M to get the movie the PR it needs to capture the Oscar audience, or else the movie will just end up in the, err, septic tank.
Word of the Week: “Perjuicio”
To be totally honest, we always thought perjuicio was just plain perwisyo, but since presidential spokesperson Edwin Lacierda spelled it that way (kung makabeki ng spelling, wagas), we’re taking it as it is. Calling the transport strike this week a perjuicio and the protesters onion-skinned, Lacierda was criticized for his apparent arrogance and his Twitter outbursts, with netizens calling him irresponsible and utak wang-wang. Lito Lapid should’ve been spokesperson instead.
