Mtv Movie Awards
MANILA, Philippines - Just like every MTV Movie Awards installment, 2010 had musical performances (if you can call Katy Perry “musical”), stunt kisses (ScarJo and Sandra Bullock, this time), and uninvited guests (go home, Lindsay Lohan, go home). This year, though, one performance stood out: Tom Cruise and Jennifer Lopez shaking their asses to Get Right. That song, of course, was released in 2005. Ah, how apt that we have Tom Cruise and J. Lo dancing to a five-year-old non-hit. Five years ago was also the last time we cared about Tom Cruise, J. Lo and the MTV Movie Awards.
Noy ‘Fasyon’
Apparently, the biggest news in local fashion isn’t along an SMX runway or in a magazine editorial; it’s on Noynoy Aquino. With stylist for the stars Liz Uy leading the presidential sartorial strategy, all eyes were on Noynoy’s proclamation and inauguration outfit — a bespoke, JC Buendia barong. If you ask Noynoy though, all you’ll get is “Lumang salamin at relo, bago ang fountain pen, bagong barong, lumang pantalon, maayos na underwear.” And with that, “clean underwear” joins the ranks of Shalani and Noy’s theme song as the things we now know but never wanted to know about our new president.
Billy Elliot Does Spidey
With his penchant for red-and-blue lycra and refusal to commit to red-headed hottie Mary Jane, you could always tell that Peter Parker wasn’t all the science and muscles his Spiderman persona let on. So with Marc Webb taking the helm at Spidey central, Petey finally gets his wish, reportedly getting Billy Elliot prima ballerina Jamie Bell to play him this go-round.
Bodybuilder Meme
Between retweets and memes, the Internet spectator gets about a million links, status messages, and what-have-yous a day. But every now and then, in a sea of artful typography and magazine scans, you get something like “Worst possible ‘date’ ever...” from something called bodybuilding.com. Linked and reblogged and finally on Twitter, the hilarious and horrifying message board post is the story of a guy who goes on a date where shit literally happens. To say more would be to give away the story. Google “Worst possible ‘date’ ever... I don’t even... FML (serios)” and take it in. It’ll make for a nice post-Supreme laugh.
Balls Everywhere
Both the FIFA World Cup and the NBA Finals are happening this week. One of them you will watch at Polo Club; the other, at your nearest bar. Now, it’s funny how our culture has a preference for American basketball. So Filipinos, please Google the word, “soccer.” It’s a game you don’t need to be a seven-foot-tall African-American to play.
Take Me To School
It’s that time of the year again! School is starting and the rain has started pouring. In fact, kids are now looking forward to seeing a friend they’ve been away from all summer: A-H1N1. We should make face masks part of students’ uniforms.
Le-Gore-Da
So Al Gore came to Manila for a talk last Tuesday — his first public appearance since announcing his divorce. The nation snapped at the chance to pair him up with single Senator Loren Legarda. See, it’s kinda like finding a man for that bitter spinster aunt everyone hates. “Hey Al, give us some global warming for this ice-cold heart.”
Taal Be Mad
PHIVOCS has raised Taal Volcano to Alert Level 2. That’s right: the thing might actually erupt. We’d like to say this is God’s punishment for over-developing the Tagaytay ridge. That high-rise they build there; that’s like putting a stick up the earth’s a**hole.
No More ‘Glee’... For Now
Hey, the Madonna episode would’ve made the perfect finale, but “Journey” wasn’t that bad, right? Mr. Schuester bawling in his car like a Nicholas Sparks heroine was such a throwback to “Crying Dawson” that it made all the annoyingly loud singing — and Rachel Berry — bearable. With the show gone for a few months, life — meaning the Internet — will probably revolve around Lady Gaga again. Unless something freakier comes down the pike, of course. That said, we’ll miss you Sue Sylvester!
The Iphone 4
The iPhone 4 is 9.3 millimeters thin and it has cameras on its front side and back side. That’s right: The iPhone 4 is an Olsen twin.