MANILA, Philippines – Supreme celebrates the ferocity of this (potential) first wives club. Where the spirit of the cougar who has a little more age, power, and the right pashmina on her — or maternal cleavage showcase (yeah, Nikki, you go, girl) — can be a boon to the country in some way. Oh, and Loren, you need to start baring those cougar claws of yours as well.
Korina Sanchez The cougar with a capital “K”
“No one gets to use me unless I want to be used,” the tough broadcasting beeyotch roared at rumors of her crying bride-to-be in order to make her man Mar a stronger president-to-be. Ms. K would know, though, knowing her way ‘round men of power (Noynoy) and having used media as her slave-bitch since God knows when (from that god-awful show with Kris to a column on Bulgar), keeping it in line with that brass-balled voice of hers. But she’s taking a break from all that, to, well, make her man a stronger president-to-be. At least if she does manage to do that, we’ll get girl-talk scoops on Carla Bruni and Mrs. Obama. Nagbabandila, Korina!
Tintin Escudero The cougar with purr-fect pitch
Over here, a political platform isn’t complete without a performance and if Chiz has something going for his, it’s the song numbers his hot number of a wife can whip out. Expect that from a That’s Entertainment alum who caught the senator’s ear in ’94, as a Diwata Lounge singer at the Sulo Hotel. After Chiz made her get some ed-credentials, she did some plays and runs a music school now. And we also hear she did a killer All I Ask of You during a gig with Bo Cerrudo (who?). ‘Course, we all know what she’ll be asking for in this election.
Dr. Elen Binay The cougar in the city
While Mr. Binay and Makati are practically inseparable, we get why Elenita had to have a piece of it as well, being Mrs. Mayor of the city from ’98-’01. After her hubby warmed the seat up for three terms, that is. Sure, there have been alleged Marie Antoinette-like tendencies, like overshooting her City Hall-furnishing budget and that whole Rockwell Bridge corruption thingy, but hello, we love Rockwell, and Greenbelt, and that new mall that lights up and changes colors. Thus, uh, we love E.B. and Jojo. Even more so that Aiza Marquez (who?) is playing her in the Binay biopic Walang Iwanan, Walang Atrasan.
Marides Fernando The pink cougar
So she’s filled Bayani’s shoes quite nicely as thrice-elected mayor of the “shoe capital” and land of pink promise, Marikina. The position and all that pink suit her, really, since keeping the city tidy all these years got her a World Mayor nomination last year. Standing firmly by her man in public service and city sanitation makes her the domestic goddess of this pack.
Nikki Prieto-Teodoro Posh cougar
A former Pantene model, Swiss education under her belt, Tatler cover girl — you can bet the Palace will at least look like one if Nikki trots in with her stilettos. But before you dismiss her as just a lady who lounges, know that as with her apparent knowledge of body toning, she also gets the legislative body of things, sitting prettily at her husband’s former congressional post in Tarlac. “You know, the only reason I’d like to be First Lady is to be able to help Filipino children,” the child welfare wonder woman said in the Feb issue of People Asia. Okay, but you’ve got to love the story on how she met Gibo at Faces Disco in the early’90s and how she loves that he can cook a mean rack of lamb. With the elections as one hell of a show, we know who deserves the Lily Van der Woodsen-like spinoff.
Kate Gordon The crusading cougar
Olongapo City was once the seedy, skanky-ho capital of the Philippines where you could order fries with your lap dance and get Special K over the counter (now the sleaze capital is Angeles — but we’re not sure if the K’s easy to come by there). After her man Dick douched the honky-tonk hub with an exceptional garbage collection program and an “Aim High” slogan, Mayor Kate cleansed it further with a feminine wash of love that included city beautification (take that, Marides!) and female empowerment, rounding up the city’s ladies to lend a hand in police work, government hospitals and medical missions. It makes you think — if she was first lady, those skanky “Nicole” types would probably have something better to do with their time.
Arlene de Castro The cougar that pounced on the cock
Technically, ABS-CBN isn’t all about its prized sari-manok (legendary cock) anymore, but Arlene’s made enough leaps and bounds in the company to claim a spot as vice president for current affairs. She’s used to rolling in serious news dirt for shows like Assignment, one of her hard-hitting ideas. Then again, a few of this cougar’s cubs pouncing on the woman not too far back — two sons alleging her abandonment of motherly duties after her first marriage ended — meant there was quite a bit of dirt on her. Still, if you’re Willie Revillame’s manager, not even a stampede of bad publicity can stop you.
Cynthia Villar Cougar of the House
She’s the woman of a lot of houses, actually — the lone congressional district of Las Piñas, House Committee on Higher Education, and low-cost housing powerhouse Camella & Palmera Homes (“the biggest homebuilder in the Philippines”). But the biggest cat with the billions ‘round here is also a class act, pawing on acts like the greening of subdivisions and helping small to large enterprises out with business one-stop shop centers (BOSS). Come to think of it, she’d make a pretty good Apprentice — especially since she’s kind of got the ‘do for it.
Alice Lacson The cougar guarded by her he-cougar
We’re not messing with this one for fear of being hunted down by her he-cougar of a husband. In any case, there isn’t much to say about a cat that seems to be nestled in a cave of mystery. Two large-balance US bank accounts under her name uncovered by the FBI in ’01 (Erap-connected, supposedly); her name used in a scam e-mail in ‘05 (premise: “Hi, I’m Alice Lacson, please help me recover the $ 30 M I lost after my husband was killed.”); uh, so anyway, wasn’t Lorna T. amazing when she played her in Ping Lacson: Supercop? Anyone see that?