To stay in New York to find a man or spend time with mom in Manila?

Dear Nanay,

I am an OFW based in New York.  I have been here for the past 12 years and I actually am enjoying my life here.  However, my entire family is there in Manila and I am starting to get homesick, especially because my mom is getting older and I want to spend more quality time with her.  I am also getting older and all my friends are married so I am not meeting any new men over here.

However, I also want to marry an American because I think I have been here so long that my cultural values are already mostly American and I don’t know if typical Filipino men will be able to get along with me.

What do you think?  Should I come home or just stay here? — AP                     

Dear AP,

It sounds like you are juggling a number of issues.  Perhaps you should think about what the most important thing is for you and then you can make a decision based on that.  If your mother is getting older and you want to spend more time with her while she is still well, then perhaps that can be your priority.

With regard to your issue of possibly not getting along with a Filipino, if you do decide to come home, perhaps you should try to go out with some Filipino men.  Although still relatively traditional, I think many of our younger generation is becoming far more progressive than how we were in my time.  So you may be pleasantly surprised if you just give Filipino men a chance.

But if you ask me, and I know I am biased, come home and spend as much quality time as possible with your mother.  Everything else can wait.  But, as you know, time may be running short and you cannot turn back the clock.                Sincerely,

Nanay

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Pawning an ATM card

Dear Nanay,

I needed money and had to sanla (pawn) my ATM card as collateral.  I also gave my PIN number because they said it was required for security.  However, last payday my entire salary was withdrawn and they said that it wasn’t them who got the money and they said that the ATM card is safely locked in their safe and nobody can get it and they don’t know anything about it.  What can I do now to stop this from happening again? — LOST ATM

Dear lost ATM,

Ask your company’s HR department to help you talk to the bank.  Immediately change your PIN code and disable the old ATM card so that even if they have your old ATM card, they will not be able to access your account.

You can also ask the bank to trace the transaction that withdrew all your funds from your account.  They will be able to tell you if it was indeed an ATM withdrawal that emptied your account.

But act now and do not wait bago ka mabiktima ulit (before you get victimized again).

Sincerely,

Nanay

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If you have a question, email us at asknanay@nationalbookstore.com.ph or just drop your letter at drop boxes in all National Book Store branches nationwide.