Haute couture, heart couture

Inno Sotto tells me a story from his childhood. It involves his mother and something she once said that he will never forget. He was about seven years old and driving in the car with his mother. A child came up to their car window, begging for money. At that time, the consensus towards beggars was to ignore them — give them something and they will get used to just a life of street solicitation. Inno’s mother, Lily Sotto, didn’t adhere to this kind of impassive ignorance. “My mother said, ‘I have eight children and if any point in time, they would need help, I hope there would be someone to help them.’ I would always remember that,” recalls the designer.

The karmic consequences of Inno’s mother’s intentions are vast but unquantifiable. Throughout the years, many people have helped Inno Sotto, especially when he first started designing 30 years ago — but it is really the example of Lily Sotto’s kind gesture that has impacted Inno the most. Because of his mother’s words, Inno has always kept in mind the importance of reaching out and helping, particularly the youth and children. And though not too many people know it, his mother’s words have encouraged Inno Sotto’s involvement with many non-profit organizations that help the helpless and disadvantaged in society.

It’s easy to think of Inno Sotto as nothing else but a designer. His trademarks — long hair, crisp white polo shirts and graceful gestures — firmly encourage this image: that of the sophisticated fashion figure, comfortably ensconced within Manila’s elite; that of the veteran designer who’s mentored many other appreciative creators. Producer of the Fashion Watch series. Creative consultant for Rustan’s. Supporter of the arts.

Given all this prolific involvement within the fashion industry, it shouldn’t be surprising that Inno Sotto would be willing to work outside of it. If there is anything he is not, it is one-dimensional.

Whether it fits into your image of him or not, Inno Sotto is also an active goodwill ambassador for the Philippine National Red Cross. Citing that it was writer Joanne Zapanta and web entrepreneur Dennis Mendiola who got him involved, Inno and ambassadors work to disseminate more information and bring new meaning to people’s image of the Red Cross. “Everyone associates it with Rosa Rosal and blood donations but the Red Cross is more than that. We connect with certain people going through things and try to help them,” explains Inno. “For example, we also help people who suffer from trauma because of losing homes or family members in a casualty or natural disaster.” He refers to the Ondoy tragedy a year ago, citing how the organization helped counsel the victims.

Inno’s Red Cross involvement has also gone international. In January of this year, he did a show in Guam to help raise funds for the American Red Cross.

Prior to becoming ambassador for Red Cross, Inno Sotto was also already working with other non-profit groups. In particular, Virlanie, the private, non-sectarian foundation that helps care for abandoned, abused, exploited, orphaned and poor children. Founded by French social worker Dominique Lemay, Virlanie relies on volunteers to help sustain kids in a less stressful environment and to put them in adoptive families. It is a cause close to Inno’s heart, who has been involved with the organization for five years. “Children can’t make decisions. We have to decide for them,” he says. It is a cause very dear to Inno, particularly since he became a father himself.

For two years now, Inno has been a doting parent to boy named Joseph Marco. The first grandson of Inno’s longtime personal assistant Julie Abalos — she’s been with him for 27 years — Marco has been with Inno since he was three months old. He took in the child to help the mother who gave birth pre-college graduation and also so Julie can spend time with her family. “She’s been with me for all these years and I wanted her to also experience being a grandmother.”

But mostly, Inno took Marco into his home because he’s always loved children. And maybe because he needed a new love in his household, especially after his longtime partner Richard Tann passed away five years ago. “When Richard died, the first few years were so gray. There was nothing, only silence. My life had no soundtrack.” Then Marco came into his life. “Now I’m lighter. I like it, being a father. My son is a whole new rush for me, a new kind of adrenaline.” For the first time in his life, Inno is just content staying put and staying home. “I don’t seem to be around too many places. Even traveling bothers me.”

If anything, having Marco in his life has strengthened Inno’s resolve to reach out more. He also helps with the Maria Lena Buhay Foundation (Fe Panililio introduced him to the organization), a group that put up a school for hearing-impaired children. At one point, the designer was also doing volunteer work at a hospice. “I had to stop though because I was getting drained.” He relates his experience with one woman he would visit with. Her husband had left her, she had three kids whom she never saw. “In a hospice, you would try to talk to them, get their mind off things. This was a woman who only had memories of her three kids when they were young. I would encourage her to talk about them.” The next time Inno visited the hospice, however, she had already passed away. “That really took so much from me.”

Now, Inno Sotto, after immersing himself with children and older people, would like to do something with women. “I lived with women all my life. I grew up with my grandmother. I’d like to get involved with something concerning women, something aside from breast cancer.” He’s thinking of working with the abused, both physically and mentally. “Verbal abuse causes so much damage, we just don’t realize it as much.”

Ironically enough, Inno Sotto has no beneficiaries in this show to celebrate his 30th year in the fashion industry. “My work is good enough for show. What I do privately is another thing.” Inno Sotto is one of those people who just want to do things quietly, who doesn’t necessarily need his charities strewn across headlines or spoken off in social lunches. “I would much prefer to do things without too much noise. I want to do these things without necessarily having going onstage. I don’t want to hide under the guise of my profession just to get more applause.”

The limelight may be heartening, but Inno would rather keep to himself the fulfillment gained from personally helping somebody else. “When you connect with a little boy or an old lady, it changes you. It keeps you so grounded. You realize that you take it with you everywhere.”