Love at first byte

The most overlooked advantage to owning a computer is that if they foul up there’s no law against whacking them around a little. — Joe Martin

The great thing about a computer notebook is that no matter how much you stuff into it, it doesn’t get bigger or heavier. — Bill Gates

First of all, let me clarify that I’m not a young tycoon and neither am I a techie who’s into the latest high-tech gizmos, so I don’t look for the flashiest laptop to acquire. I am unlike the guy who looks for a trophy wife to show off or to add glamour to his persona.

Neither am I a male chauvinist, but I recall these words by an anonymous guy (who must be hiding his identity lest his girl whack him): “Computers must be female. No one but their creators understand their internal logic. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else. The message ‘bad command or file name’ is about as informative as, ‘If you don’t know why I’m mad at you, then I’m certainly not going to tell you.’ Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.”

Have you watched the 2001 Hollywood flick Serendipity starring John Cusack and Kate Beckinsale? That film title could best sum up how I got my new laptop, for I literally stumbled into buying my new Macbook Air by accident.

My Palm Treo 680 cell phone fell recently, quite by accident, I might add. I went to The Podium in Ortigas Center looking for a shop that could repair it. While waiting for the staff at the gadgets shop to resuscitate my indispensable PDA, I was awe-struck by the slim, sexy-looking Macbook Air on the store shelf. It was love at first sight.

I researched its virtues by texting several techie friends, including Philippine STAR columnist and top novelist Butch Dalisay, and they had only good words to say about it. Of course, the No. 1 pragmatic reason I used to justify my purchase to myself — and also to my accountants Janet and Cherry if they complain about the bill — is its reputedly being virus-free. By the way, I’m willing to skip many meals or to even wash the dishes at Jollibee if necessary to pay for this purchase. No kidding!

It’s funny how I’ve postponed buying a new laptop for so long, almost similar to my postponing getting married. Why? There are just so many attractive choices of laptops out there. There are so many good young ladies I’ve met or have asked out.

 In recent months, I’ve been reading various issues of T3 magazine and other gadget magazines, plus occasionally inquiring from friends about laptops. When my editor gave me the fascinating topic to interview the Philippines’ top tycoons about their gadgets, their preferences of laptops were so diverse, so I had a hard time making the right choice. Neither did I have time to study the various differences and to choose and buy one, until a busted cell phone forced me to check out a gadget shop. This got me hooked.

Why do I need a laptop? My apologies to women for comparing them to laptops, but I believe that acquiring a good laptop is similar to winning over a good wife to help many of us less-organized men to have a more efficient and stable life. I need to be more organized! I believe women are not only more emotionally mature, pay unquestionably more attention to detail and have loads of patience, but they are also generally more organized than us guys. A wife is most often really and literally a guy’s “better half!”

It’s also a swell idea to have a laptop sharing my bedroom, instead of a personal computer. A desk top with its other paraphernalia unnecessarily occupy too much space.

Of course I know that laptops can never be compared to good women in this aspect, for a good wife is infinitely much better than a laptop to be with in the bedroom.

I need a portable computer that’s ultra-light, because I’m always out of the office due to my being in a small real estate business. Also, my love of writing keeps me on the go. A reliable laptop is my ever-present assistant even up to midnight every day. Now, this is something I can’t expect or demand from any secretary or assistant.

Love of traveling is one passion of mine, which makes owning a laptop a basic necessity. I’m already set to explore various European countries this October to December, with plans to add destinations to other exotic nearby continents in January. A handy laptop by my side is essential for storing memories which I shoot with my digital camera photos or by writing them down.

Sadly, even the world’s sexiest laptop is no match for having a good wife or girlfriend to share one’s travel adventures!

Two other reasons which compelled me to get a new laptop are my two new avocations — I’ve accepted an invitation to teach part-time at the 106-year-old La Consolacion College Manila and I’ve also recently been invited to become editor of S magazine by Mega Publishing. S is a glossy showbiz mag; I love movies and among my childhood dreams is to be the director or producer of great unforgettable films. 

I am in love with my new Macbook Air because of qualities which would make me want to marry a girl in the (hopefully near) future — she has character, is irresistibly beautiful, undeniably smart, and indescribably fun!

Thanks for your messages, all will be answered. Comments or suggestions welcome at willsoonflourish@gmail.com or wilson_lee_flores@yahoo.com.