Pirates of the Caribbean, pirates of Philippine politics
He who fights monsters should look into it that he himself does not become a monster. When you gaze long into the Abyss, the Abyss also gazes into you. — Friedrich Nietzsche
We do not have to visit a madhouse to find disordered minds; our planet is the mental institution of the universe. — Johann von Goethe
I don’t think I can qualify as a strictly artistic or literary critic when assessing a film, because I usually go to movies wanting to be simply entertained, cajoled, humored, heartbroken, bewitched or transported out of this mundane world of ours. In this “mababaw na kaligayahan” (shallow sense of enjoyment) sense, I give my thumbs up to the latest fun mayhem-and-adventure flick, Pirates of the
Thanks to those behind this visually satisfying, action-packed, colorful carnival/ferris wheel/roller-coaster ride through the treacherous high seas and pirate-infested world of the Caribbean centuries ago directed by Gore Verbinski, scripted by writers Ted Elliot and Terry Rossio, starring the hilarious Johnny Depp as pirate Jack Sparrow, Geoffrey Rush as Barbossa, Orlando Bloom as the luckless lover Will Turner, the beautiful Keira Knightley as the courageous Elizabeth Swann, Hong Kong superstar Chow Yun-Fat as the Singaporean pirate Captain Sao Feng (why was he always speaking in Cantonese when a majority of Singaporeans are — like most ethnic Chinese of the Philippines — Hokkien speakers and not Hong Kong Cantonese?), among others.
However, I wish to question why the MTRCB has classified this film as G, or suitable for general patronage, when it should have been classified as PG-13, so that kids below 13 years old are accompanied by adults. Unlike my two nephews, aged 12 and 13, who seemed to be relishing most of the mayhem, I had to literally turn away my eyes from some scary scenes with monsters, battle sequences and other shocks which I prefer not to detail here in this nice Sunday newspaper. Parents and family elders are strongly advised to accompany their kids to this movie!
Pardon my saying this, but watching this third installment of the Pirates of the Caribbean series and the chaos between the endlessly battling selfish British colonial overlords, the pirates and all sorts of monsters, I couldn’t help but feel a sense of déjà vu about a true-to-life tragic-comic drama which I would entitle “Pirates of the Philippine Election.” Isn’t the cosmic timing of this film coming out right after our elections (the counting seems to be so long and susceptible to attacks by shadowy pirates) just perfect, too?
In the Hollywood flick, we have a brooding female, all-powerful, feared and unpopular witch-like character called Calypso (played by Naomie Harris), also the resurrected and glib-talking pirate Barbossa, the vile and scheming mafia-like villain Lord Beckett (played by Tom Hollander) of the corrupt East India Company, the squid-faced Davy Jones (played by Bill Nighy) whose heart is pumping away, troubled and hidden in a sunken chest (thus making him technically heartless and impervious to sword attacks) and other villains. Who in Philippine politics might be their equivalents?
In our recent expensive (how much was overspent?) and surreal Philippine elections, we also had our large, colorful and sordid cast of various jueteng lords, vice lords, lahar lords, smuggling lords and diverse feudal lords nationwide, complete with their private armies, their guns, goons, gold — and their gall. And, similar to characters in this movie, why are many of our once politically dead and vanquished politicians still coming back again and again? In addition to the pirates trying to buy or steal votes, our recent elections also had a Walt Disney-like cast of priests, coup plotters, movie stars, dreamers, idealists, comedians and others joining the violent fray.
The only thing missing in the “Pirates of the Philippine Election” was a nice but short and contentious romance subplot, akin to that of ill-starred lovers Will Turner (Orlando Bloom) and the alluringly sexy yet feisty Elizabeth Swann (Keira Knightley). Watch for their fun scene combating the villains in elegant, seamlessly clever ballet-like choreography combined with old-fashioned romance onboard the rocking topsy-turvy battleship in the raging sea.
In the beginning of this movie and throughout, we are reminded that this was the 18th century, when shameless British imperialists had suspended their own Western-style civil rights, and those who opposed were deemed troublemakers and herded to the gallows. Ironically, the movie portrays a sense of honor among the pirates back then, as they voted to go to war via popular vote through a democratic election of their own pirate king.
Not so different from our Philippine politics, each of the pirate lords back then were perennially deadlocked in bitter squabbles because each wanted to be the king, until a surprise vote ends the impasse. How do I best describe both the
Despite the loud noise, bloody mayhem, hallucination scenes and dizzying array of plots and subplots within this blockbuster film, and regardless of the excess of lying, stealing, back-stabbing, murderous and cheating buccaneers vis-à-vis ghouls, monsters and politicians in the movie, I congratulate Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End — and, for that matter, the conduct of the Philippine elections — for pulling off an incomprehensibly surreal, boisterous, imperfect but eventually fun and satisfying success! Despite all its imperfections, inanities, tragedies, monsters and unnecessary violence, our last election was a difficult but real triumph for Philippine democracy and should inspire us to keep on fighting fearlessly!
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