They rationalize that a polygamous tycoon at least uses his own private money to sustain his wives and families, so this transgression is a private familial matter. It’s a different matter for politicos with extra-marital romantic dalliances – people perceive them as being sucked into a vicious cycle of corruption and deceit. After all, extra wives and children cost money to sustain, especially with the kind of lifestyle they get used to, and with government officials’ meager salaries, how can they do it? Politicians in this situation will say that they have businesses of their own to support their families. Yet again, there is the question of undue influence, which is why government officials are asked to divest themselves of their business interests.
A prominent young politician who confesses to having an extra-marital girlfriend insisted to the Philippine STAR that some polygamous or philandering politicos can also serve the country well, as shown by the examples of former US Presidents Bill Clinton and John F. Kennedy. He argued that marital infidelity does not necessarily lead to corruption in government. But still, I pointed out, Kennedy and Clinton might actually be some of the few extraordinary exceptions, and that inability to control one’s baser instincts may condemn leaders to unavoidable corruption and moral decadence harmful to the national interest.
Mayor Joey Marquez of Parañaque City is a married man, allegedly with various illicit affairs in the past, but it was his recent ludicrous love affair with former presidential daughter Kris Aquino that further magnified his notoriety. But can he maintain honesty in public service if he does not curb his philandering ways?
In more general terms, can a father with more than 10 children and more than one wife be able to remain honest? (The cost of schooling alone would give any man a heart attack.)
The romantic liaison of President Ramos with Baby Arenas has been talked about in social circles, but he assiduously kept this affair discreet and away from the media spotlight as much as possible. During a long conversation, he once half-jokingly dispensed interesting and wise advice on how to handle girlfriends outside of marriage (though this bachelor has no plans to become a philandering husband).
In the case of the charismatic Erap, his government was brought down mainly by his perceived extravagance: the alleged grand mansions and other displays of power and wealth by his various "wives." When it comes to philandering, Erap has few equals in Philippine politics for unlike the late President Marcos, who was also to some extent discreet, Erap almost relished flaunting his love for women. Erap once told me that ever since his movie-making days, women just naturally gravitated toward him especially during long out-of-town shootings. But more than his showbiz celebrity, it was his political power that became an aphrodisiac, drawing women to his arms and bed.
Even Commonwealth President Manuel Quezon was reputedly a playboy. The late President Diosdado Macapagal recounted to this writer that when he was working as part of the Malacañang Palace staff, he would see First Lady Doña Aurora Quezon shouting and looking for her husband while President Quezon was at sea on a yacht with a young lady. Despite his eloquence and talents, Quezon was perceived as a quintessential traditional politician. In contrast, President Sergio Osmeña was a personally upright leader similar to President Cory C. Aquino, devoid of personal scandals or romances outside marriage. In their personal capacities, the late President Sergio Osmeña and President Cory C. Aquino were also untouched by corruption rumors.
Indeed, this writer believes that perhaps one accurate way to judge the integrity of our public officials is to assess his faithfulness to his own spouse and family. Who then among the possible 2004 presidential contenders are the most faithful and honest to their spouses? President Gloria Arroyo, Raul Roco, Ping Lacson, Loren Legarda or Ed Angara?
Real estate developer and former Batangas Governor Tony Leviste was previously married, but apparently in order not to be perceived as a philandering man, he converted to Islam and his only spouse now is Senator Loren Legarda. A business tycoon once confidentially showed me a photo album of all his extra-marital girlfriends and mistresses of the past half-century, sharing numerous anecdotes. There are also many more tycoons who are faithful to their wives, though they still appreciate beautiful women when they see them.
During a recent dinner at Banana Leaf restaurant in his Podium mall, I asked "Shopping Mall King" Henry Sy why is it that unlike many top politicians and tycoons, he is so faithful to his wife Felicidad Tan Sy? The self-effacing tycoon replied: "Because it is my nature." At another meeting with JG Summit Holdings founder John Gokongwei Jr. in his home, I commented that he is admired by many women for his being faithful to his wife Elizabeth Yu Gokongwei.
At another late-night dinner with self-made "Tobacco King" Lucio C. Tan in his special suite at the Century Park Sheraton, I once asked him pointblank how many wives does he really have. Lucio Tan seemed flustered for a few seconds and then replied with a laugh, "For the answer to your question, I will have to consult with my accountants."