While the old adage “opposites attract” may make for a wonderfully exciting marriage, when it comes to matters of the home it could translate into decorative disaster. Moving into your new home as newlyweds is such a beautiful milestone in a relationship, it is the symbol of your new life together and also an opportunity to truly get to know one another even deeper as you tackle the mundane — paying bills and household chores — and of course the creative — furniture, décor and art. It becomes a grand ballet of give and take, the full embracement of the magical art of compromise all while trying to maintain one’s individual sense of personality. In last week’s episode of Modern Living TV, I interviewed Stephanie Kienle-Gonzalez of Philux and art consultant Miguel Rosales who shared with us a few key pointers on how to decorate your home in marital harmony.
•Timeless basics. When it comes to choosing your furniture, Kienle-Gonzalez suggests keeping your key pieces classic and timeless. The major investment items in any home would be the dining table, the sofa and of course – something you will use every night – the bed. These items are more often than not a little pricey and worth spending on so that they can last a long time. Look for sturdy quality materials such as solid hardwood and metal in clean, classic designs and basic colors so that you can easily redecorate around it throughout the years. Bear in mind space and utility. It doesn’t make sense to get a large dining table that seats 12 if you have a small apartment and a small kitchen; or a massive king size bed that takes up your whole room when a good queen size will do. If you live in a one bedroom unit you may want the option of a couch that can easily transform into a guest bed in case you have visiting friends or relatives. Keep these pieces in a neutral palette – beige, cream, grey, khaki for fabrics and a flexible wood stain such as coffee or mahogany – until you are confident of your style as a couple then you can easily have them re-finished or re-upholstered.
•Fun accents. Play up your individual personalities through small touches. Throw pillows, lighting fixtures and decorative items like bookends, vases etc. are easily changed throughout the years. Accent chairs, side tables and consoles are also great mediums for experimentation. Just remember the bigger and more prominent the piece the more crucial it is for both of you to agree on it.
•Out with the old and in with the new? You may have acquired some furniture during your single life or perhaps inherited some heirloom pieces that you thought about bringing into your new married home. While Kienle-Gonzalez says you don’t have to get rid of all of it, it's important to talk it out and make that decision to keep or toss together. It’s not fair to your spouse to hang on to something he or she absolutely abhors! A good solution is to keep these pieces in your own individual spaces like a dressing room or a home office and away from the common rooms where you entertain or share – like the living, dining and the bedroom. “The rest of the things that don’t have space…” says Kienle-Gonzalez “Well, I’m sorry, they just have to go!”
You may have your home all furnished but your walls are completely bare… Acquiring art as a couple is a truly difficult task because art is extremely personal. It touches on emotions, memories and archetypal sensibilities and it is very common to find even the most solid of couples disagreeing over a painting. I know for a fact that my husband and I can have very divergent tastes in artwork but there is nothing more wonderful than that feeling of being in joyful agreement over a purchase. Migs Rosales shares with us his tips for first-time art buyers.
• Buy with your eyes and not with your ears. “It’s important to purchase a piece because you like it and not because someone else told you so,” explains Rosales. It’s important not to let friends, art critics, media and decorators force you into purchasing something you don’t feel 100 percent about. At the end of the day it is you who will have to live with the piece and see it everyday.
• Any art is good art. It doesn’t matter if it was bought at a fancy auction or in a department store, if you love it then that makes it invaluable.
• Don’t try to forcibly match your artwork to your décor.While its nice to keep an overall harmony it’s important not to purchase something just because it matches your furniture or color scheme. You have to sincerely enjoy the piece. Also many times contrast makes for a more interesting environment and keeps your space from looking like a catalog or a showroom. My husband and I personally buy artworks that we absolutely love without really thinking what it’s for and where it will go. We feel that eventually it will find its own space. Although now that our collection has grown, we have started to see some gaps on our wall that need filling with a particular size or style. However, with that in mind, we are happy to keep the gaps empty until the absolute perfect piece comes along.
• Research and reconnaissance. If you truly want to start collecting, Rosales suggest actively researching your preferred artists and attending their shows. Over time you will realize what styles you like. Explore also other forms of art such as sculptures, prints and engravings, drawings and photographs… It doesn’t always have to be a painting.
• Compromise. Compromise. Compromise. The magic word for a happy marriage. Based on my personal experience, my husband and I have avoided arguments over art by following simple guidelines. Large, expensive pieces need to be agreed on by both of us especially if it will be in a room we both use often. There are truly moments where he will adore something I absolutely hate and vice versa, but if it’s a small piece or not too expensive and can be displayed somewhere discretely for our own individual personal enjoyment then there’s no reason not to purchase it. The same principles can definitely be applied to furniture or everything else for that matter because at the end of the day, being married doesn’t mean losing your individual personalities but learning how to live in harmony and growing to appreciate and love each other wholly with all your quirks even more and more each day.