At 70,” said my aunt, “Your mind must be concentrated and fixed.”
“On what?” I asked.
“On facing the gallows,” she replied. “For living la vida loca of extortion, pilferage, filching and sacking.”
“But I’m a good girl, I am,” I retorted.
“Girl,” she admonished. “Not in the real sense but in the figurative sense.”
Immediately, I thought of Johnny Depp in Pirates of the Caribbean, biting his ugly, grimy fingernails, looking foul than fish-kill beds, messy and unkempt yet adept at wiggling out of tense situations while hood-winking his rivals and getting a reprieve from walking the plank. Johnny’s the most ingenious of scoundrels, really.
“But Tita, my mind is not fixed…yet,” I replied. I still love to daydream, forgetting my age in fact, lost in topnotch fantasies of altering my children’s lives (“Sistah, not possible!”) so they lessen browbeaten days and have a better grasp on miracles, daily miracles.
Maybe, even if I reach the s’wonderful age of 70, I shall continue to daydream, wandering about as girlishly and as plainly as I do now.
My friend Maurita Arce loved to quote, “The years teach much which days never know.” That’s because we used to think of minutes, hours, days, weeks and months passing in a slower, controlled rate than years counted in decades. But now, the years have picked up speed and are flashing just as fast as finding another gray hair, another wrinkle or another sun spot on one’s face – that weren’t there yesterday. We try to preserve our good old selves although our bones and our memory may have started to rebel if not disagree, squeakily.
Many times, we cheerfully waste whole days as if we will always have an unending supply of time on hand but it is not so. Time marches on.
There is also that thought that as we grow older, we empty our lives of ambition but not the passion to widen our perspective in the hope of finding serenity while still alive and still interacting with family and friends.
And that brings me to another question: Which will make you live longer? Family or friends?
“Friends!” came the resounding reply from a survey made by a group of wellness gurus in Australia.
There is a gentle, feel-good benefit derived from having friends who guard your secrets, share your heartaches, and help solve problems with you. As your sounding board, they help you process your thoughts so that you remain calm, don’t act hastily or be consumed by emotions. But if you must cry, they cry with you, not to mention fight your battles whether on the field or on your knees.
However, family can stave disabilities; they provide security, make you lead a healthier life (because they watch your eating habits and make sure you follow your doctor’s advice), and you become less prone to accident because they physically assist you in your daily functions and shield you from the line of fire, from all manner of maladies.
Family can serve as your crutch. Should you become feeble consequently emotional and wistful, they hold your hand and best, never leave you alone. Caution: This pertains to kind and caring family who truly love you.
In summary, family and friends have redeeming qualities that compensate for their shortcomings.
“Plan for your Eternal Life now,” my aunt said and that got me wondering, “Oh goodness, she’s right.”
Who among us has not aimed for a planchado crease-less life by planning ahead, securing the future and avoiding surprises?
We got ourselves a honing device or GPS on all kinds of plans: Retirement, medical, accident, college education, memorial, interment, last will, living will, even a pick on the final resting place: Casket or cremation?
When the party’s over and you’ve surrendered all man-made policies and contracts, what happens next?
Where do we really go?
Up there or down below?
Why are we only preoccupied with earthly stuff, of fame, riches and glory? Money and possessions can be significant obstacles if you have the wrong mind-set toward them. Someone said, “You may become self-serving, thinking only of your comfort and your perceived need for financial security if not get distracted by the cares and responsibilities that come with greater wealth. Worse, you may get a false sense of security that gives rise to a greater sense of pride and self-sufficiency.”
However, if you are on the other side of the fence, if you are struggling to make ends meet, don’t let anxiety or cares weigh you down. Keep faith and never give up. Above all, remember you already gain by keeping a generous heart. You give to others in a way that’s in line with your means, not in terms of cold cash.
A song in the 1970’s sang about the good things in life and the people who made it so. Oftentimes, we forget to show our appreciation; a simple “thank you” that is spoken straight from the heart would be a great way to store up provisions in our (Eternal Life) basket.
“Imagine if your basket has been filled up to capacity? Girl, what a glorious picnic you’re going to have,” said my aunt.
“Love, song and a pure heart – you would have everything you’d need.”
“Up there,” I avowed.
And that’s no daydream.