What's going on?

My favorite TV show these days is Hall–mark’s The Good Wife, which comes out on Thursday nights at 10. It is work for me to stay up that late, but I try because I enjoy it. The main character is Alicia Florrick, played by Julianna Margulies. She came out as a nurse in the very early ER, the one who fell in love with George Clooney. Here she plays the role of a good wife to Chris Noth, the actor who played opposite Sarah Jessica Parker in the movie Sex & the City. This is a mini-series. He used to work for the government, incidentally had a hyperactive sex life, until someone who wanted his position filed a case against him. So, to make the long story short, he goes to jail.

First there was the standard scene we’ve seen over and over and over again. The man standing in front of the mic making a statement. His wife standing beside him looking blankly at the camera. He has been caught fooling around and she still stands by his side. That’s a scene I cannot stand. I’m always on the verge of saying, “What kind of a woman are you? Your husband is fooling around and you’re standing there taking all of it in? Why don’t you walk away from him? He should never treat you that way.” But of course, all the women I’ve seen are on American TV so what is the use?

In The Good Wife she apparently did not know what was going on. When he took her hand and led her out backstage through the kitchen, she slapped him. I saw that in the first episode. That kept me watching. To this day nobody knows if she will divorce him or not, but we know she thinks about it on and off. The good thing about her is she rejoins the old law firm where she used to work and is a good lawyer. So there is a litigation story, too. Interesting watching, worth staying up for.

But The Good Wife is a mini-series. It resides in the realm of fantasy. You watch cable, you see the story of Tiger Woods — and may I add — the miracle of Tiger Woods. He never struck me as a man with any sex appeal. I knew he was a good golfer but that’s all. But today, after all these stories and his days spent in a rehab clinic to rid himself of his sex addiction, I look at the man and what do I see? He now has sex appeal. Something has happened to him.

Then there’s the story of the beautiful Sandra Bullock who catches her husband and his steamy infidelities. I remember sometime ago watching a show that interviewed her and she said she was planning to act less and stay home with her husband more. Now the beautiful lady is first enraged, then heartbroken, then angry, then dismayed, all those horrible emotions that rise up in you when you find your husband is fooling around. They can make you feel absolutely angry and very profoundly pained. I know what they’re going through. As I watch I remember it well.

So what is going on here? Just the results of men’s infidelities? Let me say this. I have never met a man who was completely faithful to his wife. Never. Therefore, I must believe that all men are infidels. Yes, I do believe that. And consequently I believe that women also have rights to their infidelities. I think that would be fair. This is best illustrated by my other favorite TV show Mad Men. The hero’s wife, who has also caught him at an infidelity, picks up a stranger at a bar even as she knows that she has agreed to go back to her husband. She is not in love with the other man but she wants revenge and she gets it. That makes her a little less angry, makes her feel a little bit better.

I honestly do not know what is going on here but something is. I wonder sometimes if it is the beginning of the death of the traditional marriage. Men — and women, too, I’m sure if they just dare to be honest — say they get tired of the women they’ve been married to for many, many years. They love them but time has turned them into sisters or mothers, not sexy any more. So they fool around with other women. Well, I know women feel the same way but they don’t want to say because it would be against the church or religion or motherhood or whatever they’ve been taught.

Me? I decided a long time ago I did not believe in marriage. In the end it’s just a relationship based on keeping the money together. In the end there may be affection but there’s no more lust and no matter what people think, lust feels better than love. Really, I tease friends and ask them if they’re falling in lust. That’s more passionate than loving.

I don’t know. Something is definitely going on. I think it’s a test for women. Are you really ready to assert your equality? Then leave him and take his money or earn your own. That’s why I like The Good Wife. She earns her own money. I think women should take their lives into their own hands. You can do it. It’s not impossible. In the end, you will be happier, I promise.

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