Many years ago during one family gathering, my youngest son Anton was in a conversation about money with our relatives and he said, “Oh, I do have a big psychological wallet!” And all the titos and titas expressed surprise to hear this from a young grade school kid, “Psychological what?”
Months before this happened, my young bunso asked me, “Ma, how come a lot of stories are about rich people who are bad and poor people who are good. But I want to be rich and good!” After that I gave him the book of Bo Sanchez entitled 8 Secrets of the Truly Rich and he really liked it. And that’s where he got the term psychological wallet. To quote Bo, “The poor have tiny psychological wallets. God wants to give them more but their psychology can’t handle the blessing.”
What is psychological wallet?
My interpretation and the way I explained it to my son goes something like this. Psychological wallet is the way you think about and treat money. For adults, we call that mindset. This mindset is like a container. It dictates how much blessings you can receive and keep.
If your psychological wallet is small, you will have a hard time receiving and keeping money. For example, if you receive a huge amount of money, you will just spend it all right away buying unnecessary things, because your container is too small to keep the amount.
If your psychological wallet is big, you will be able to receive a lot of money and keep it because your container is big. You can even share it with others because you’re comfortable with money.
And I guess, for a kid who already had a Balance Sheet and was investing in stocks even if his daily allowance was only P20.00, he felt he had a huge psychological wallet!
How the small psychological wallet works
Here are examples of how the small psychological wallet works:
1. Lotto winners. News about lotto winners are always coupled with unfortunate endings. Around 70% of lotto winners end up broke in three to five years. They buy big ticket items left and right and usually end up in situations worse than before winning the lotto. They are not prepared with a big psychological wallet to receive and keep the huge earnings.
2. Heirs. If heirs are unprepared to receive their inheritance, they can also end up poor. Most of the time the value they put on the inheritance may not be the same as that of the earlier generations since they did not work for it. This is where the adage, “The first generation makes it, the second maintains it, and the third squanders it.”
3. Retirees. Receiving the largest amount of money they have ever seen in their lifetime without proper preparation can easily make retirees feel and behave like “one day millionaires.” They end up renovating their homes, buying cars and other luxuries, or even getting into a business that they don’t know anything about. The lack of knowledge about how much a million really lasts can make a retiree “feel rich” all of a sudden.
4. Employees with pay hike. The simplest and most common example of how small psychological wallet works is shown in how employees treat their income hikes - their regular annual merit increases, bonuses, and significant increase due to promotion or new job. Pairing off all your pay hikes with increases in expenses is the systematic display of small psychological wallets.
5. Those who blow their chance at improving their financial condition. I know someone who owns a company that employs the poorer sectors of society and she observes this unfortunate pattern. Employees who are doing well and improving their lot but then end up going back to where they started because of a sense of guilt of abandoning their poor family and friends. Their improvement in financial condition is stunted by their psychological wallet that remain small just so they remain loyal to their family and friends.
In all of the above examples, there is a discomfort about wealth. There is that feeling that this may not be for me, so I have to get rid of it. And mind you, this is not a conscious but an unconscious feeling, belief, and behavior.
How to enlarge your Psychological Wallet
1. Figure out what you really want in life and connect with your values. Be vivid. Being clear with your goals and dreams gives compelling reason to enlarge your psychological wallet.
2. Stop the vicious cycle of financial dependency. Don’t be a financial burden to your loved ones. On the other hand, stop enabling the financial dependence of others on you so that you don’t impede your preparation for your own future.
3. Understand that self-development necessitates growth not just in your profession but in all aspects of life including your psychological wallet.
4. If you’re in a tight situation right now, treat it as a temporary condition and keep growing your psychological wallet.
5. Observe the three basic laws of money. (Click here)
I hope the above helps in making you enlarge your own psychological wallet. Cheers to high FQ!
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ANNOUNCEMENTS
1. Mom and Son Podcast - Season 3 Episode 2 (VJ DANI MORTEL & VJ AYA FERNANDEZ)
What's up everyone! Today we start a 3 episode special with our guests VJs DaniMortel&Aya Fernandez! Today's episode tackles the journey of the Myx VJ Search 2019, what actually happens behind the camera? We also share each of our individual stories and mindset, now as we further our careers.
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2. Thanks to those who already bought the FQ Book, especially to those who took the time out to send me their feedback. Your feedback is food for my soul. To those who have not gotten their copy yet, here’s a short preview of FQ: The nth Intelligence
You may now purchase the book in major bookstores, or if you want autographed copies, please go to FQ Mom FB page (click SHOP), or FQMom.com (click BOOKS), or email us at FQMomm@gmail.com
3. Want to know where your FQ stands? Take the FQ Test Challenge now! Click link. http://rebrand.ly/FQTest
Rose FresFausto is a speaker and author of bestselling books Raising Pinoy Boys and The Retelling of The Richest Man in Babylon (English and Filipino versions). Click this link to read samples – Books of FQ Mom. She is a Behavioral Economist, Certified Gallup Strengths Coach and the grand prize winner of the first Sinag Financial Literacy Digital Journalism Awards. Follow her on Facebook&YouTube as FQ Mom, and Twitter&Instagram as theFQMom. Her latest book is FQ: The nth Intelligence.
ATTRIBUTIONS: Photos from istockphoto.com, illustration by PioTendero, express.co.uk, pinterest.com, kisspng.com, ya-webdesign.com, freepnglogos.com, and hwco.com, modified and used to help deliver the message of the article.