Filipinos express love for their partners more than other Asians

Did you know that Filipinos are the second among their Asian neighbors to derive fulfillment in terms of relationships with their spouses/partners? That Filipinos express love for their partners more than any other nationality in Asia? But did you also know that Filipino couples argue the most in the region? Agree or disagree?

These findings — and more — can be gleaned from Asia’s first relationship index launched by Pru Life UK that looks at the state of health of relationships (with partners, children, parents, friends, relatives) in 10 Asian countries as all these are “vital to our happiness, well-being, and longevity” as we kick-start yet another year.

Pinoys’ relationship satisfaction score is 79 percent, meaning that our relationships fulfill 79 percent of our desired relationship needs, the second highest in Asia. Coming in first is Vietnam (83/100) while China posts the lowest score (54/100).

Rose Fres Fausto: “Good relationships make us happier and healthier.”

Some 500 interviews were conducted online covering Metro Manila, with respondents, 25 to 55 years old, coming from the top 2/3 of household incomes in Manila. More than 5,000 interviews were conducted in 10 countries and territories in Asia, including Cambodia, China, Hong Kong, Indonesia, Malaysia, Philippines, Singapore, South Korea, Thailand, and Vietnam.

“Relationships are at the heart of our business. We know our customers buy our products to protect the people and relationships they care most about. We also know that good relationships are crucial to our happiness and good health. Through the Pru Life UK Relationship Index, we want to help Filipinos understand their relationships better so they can make them more rewarding,” asserts Antonio Manuel De Rosas, president/CEO, Pru Life UK. “The findings from the research are both cause for celebration and concern. Celebration in that we Filipinos value relationships grounded on important attributes such as partnership, companionship, respect, and honesty. However, gaps are also present in the level of relationship satisfaction with family demands, financial uncertainty, and technology causing rising tension and stress.”

“Good relationships make us happier and healthier,” says Rose Fres Fausto, who herself found happiness after leaving her job as an investment banker and becoming full-time mom to her three boys. “That’s what they found out from the Harvard longitudinal study that began in 1938 and continues to this day. Some of the young men in the survey in 1938 became very successful, some becoming presidents of the US. It’s high time that an institution that is Pru Life brought our attention to this most important ingredient in a successful life — our relationships with our spouses or partners, parents, children, siblings, friends, relatives, even our co-workers.”

Rose is quick to clarify, “Yes, we’re tops in terms of expressing our love for our partners, but we also love to fight with our partners, mahilig tayong makipag-away. But the presence of conflict is a sign of a higher engagement, meaning di tayo dedma to one another. And the higher the engagement, the higher the satisfaction. A relationship expert, Dr. John Gottman, said that there has to be a magic ratio for a relationship to be successful: one is to five. For every negative encounter, there should be five corresponding positive encounters; otherwise, you’re headed for splitsville.”

Other findings from this new research on the highs and lows of Filipino personal relationships:

Relationships With Partners

• Be with me. Pinoys value partners with whom they can enjoy doing things together. 84 percent say enjoying doing things with their partners is very important for a good relationship — this is higher than the regional average of 63 percent.

• Laugh with me. Filipinos with the best relationships are those who laugh most frequently with each other (note: not at each other). 89 percent laugh with their partners at least once a week and 67 percent do so every day, the highest in the region.

• Let me be me. Pinoys value partners who value their individuality. 84 percent think this is necessary in an ideal partner compared with a regional average of 65 percent.

• Be an ideal partner. For Filipino relationships to be strong and successful, an ideal partner should also: Be honest with me, 82 percent; be easy to get along with, 78 percent; stand up for me, 74 percent.

• How much do you love me? Let me count the times you say “I love you.” Pinoys may well be the best loverly couples in Asia, as they express their love for each more than anyone else in Asia. 87 percent tell their partners “I love you” once a week; 68 percent do so every day. Filipinos are most likely to share intimate moments with their partners (87 percent); 89 percent kiss each other at least once a week.

• Darling, leave me alone! I’d rather sleep with my phone. Next to money, 41 percent of couples argue about lack of attention and 37 percent about their partner spending too much time on the phone or the computer. 19 percent admit they sometimes prefer their phones to intimacy with their partner. 27 percent say that intimacy with their partners has suffered because of smartphones. But 94 percent say they would consider giving up technology for one day so they could spend more time with other people (possibly their partners?).

Relationships With Children

• Parents in the Philippines have the highest relationship scores (59/100) with their children in Asia, compared with an average score for the region (48/100).

• Filipino parents are most likely in the region to think it is important that they enjoy doing things together with their children (75 percent) vis-a-vis 59 percent on average in the region.

• Filipino parents are the most likely to give advice (often unsolicited?) to their children at least once a week (90 percent) while some do so every day (59 percent).

Relationships With Friends

• It’s more friendly in the Philippines. The relationship score that Filipinos have with their best friends is 50/100, the highest for friends in the region. Filipinos are most likely to want their friends to share their personal secrets, comfort them when they’re sad, and listen to them.

Care to know more? Visit Pru Life UK Relationship Index and watch the “That’s Me” relationship video.