Dear Eppy,
I am a mother of four. All my children have grown up and have their own lives now. They are all successful in their own fields except for one. My third child has always been my problem. He has always had problems with drugs. At first, we caught him using marijuana. We have been monitoring him since he was in high school just so we can be sure that he isn’t taking marijuana.
After marijuana, he went into other drugs. No matter what I tried, nothing works. He has been in three different drug rehabilitation centers, but nothing has changed. He still takes drugs and my husband and I are frustrated already. We feel we can’t do anything about it.
Is there hope? Can we really do anything about it?
Sad Mother
Dear sad Mother,
Yes, there is hope. There is always hope for everyone. Your son may not have responded to the three rehabilitation centers because they have not gone down to the core of his real problem. In the past, there is only one way of seeing the use of alcohol and drugs. That is, it is a disease and must be treated as such. Today, it is different. There are many perspectives in the treatment of substance use.
Most people see that people’s alcohol or drug problem is exactly that, that their use of substances is the problem. This perception makes people count the number of times a person took drugs or alcohol, or they check if they took drugs or not.
Drug use or alcoholism is not the problem. It is only a result or a manifestation of the real problem. So counting and suppressing the use of alcohol or drugs will lead nowhere.
If drug use and alcoholism is not the problem, then what is? Similar to everyone taking drugs and alcohol is the experience of trauma. These people went through life scared and worried. Their way of avoiding these experiences is to be in an altered state of consciousness. There are many ways of putting one’s self in an altered state of consciousness. One way is to meditate, another is to sleep and dream, another is to be hypnotized. Unfortunately, another way of going into an altered state of consciousness is to take drugs and alcohol.
When a person uses drugs and alcohol, that person does not think of putting himself into an altered state of consciousness. Rather, his goal is to actually feel happiness or numb the sorrow that he may be experiencing. He doesn’t have the scientific concept of an “altered state of consciousness.” Therefore, he is oblivious of the different options that can bring him into an altered state of consciousness.
If people in the rehabilitation center focus on the life of the person using drugs or alcohol and treat the real problem, there might be a higher probability that the person using drugs or alcohol will be able to handle his use of substances.
Maybe it will help if you send your son to a wellness center in Bonifacio Global City. They believe in the same principles that I have written here in this response. They believe that drug and alcohol users are victims of circumstance. They don’t believe that these people victimize others. They believe that alcohol and drug users should be treated with kindness and compassion, instead of judging them and treating them harshly.
This wellness center in BGC has trained staff that can draw out issues in a person’s life. This helps the individual reflect on these issues. Finding other ways of dealing with these issues instead of having only the option of taking alcohol and drugs to deal with these issues.
If you wish to get in touch with this wellness center, their number is 09355277930.
Eppy
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Email eppygochangco@gmail.com.