Keeping your feet on terra firma

On a pilgrimage to the Marian apparition sites in Europe, Fr. Dave Concepcion spilled some gems of wisdom that, if taken to heart, could keep one grounded.  It was a reminder that we are no more important than anyone else.

• Always make your future bigger than your past.

Do you remember daydreaming as a teenager?  You’d lie around listening to music and mooning over that handsome boy you met at a party who danced all night with you.  Musings whirled around your head so you wrote them down in a diary, the one with the lock and key, sang American pop singer Neil Sedaka, in the early 1960s.

 I read somewhere that in retrospect, daydreaming may seem like a frivolous waste of time, but it served a useful purpose. It gave you a chance to tune in to your fantasy world, to learn what you liked or envision what the future looks like.  It helped to prime your psyche to accept love and passion when they happened along.  It boosted your confidence.

But in reality, dreams and plans go awry.  We must never give up, however, on the notion that for every brand-new day, things could and do get better no matter how many times we’ve hit our head on the wall or shattered our hearts.

You forgive, but you don’t forget.  You build on your experience and know that the lessons of the past can serve as your badges of courage, tenacity, and perseverance for a brighter, better tomorrow. 

• Always make your contribution bigger than your reward.

I was standing by the hotel lift when I overheard a woman say, “We made P15 million to build more classrooms.  Isn’t that incredible?”  The lady standing next to her replied, “Hmm, will photos of the fund-raising be published?”  The woman sighed.  “Ooh-la-la!  If we don’t, only half or a quarter would donate.  Media exposure goes with the territory.”

 â€œAnd that is why I hold in high regard those who donate anonymously,” she continued.  “There is no obligation to impress anyone, much less themselves.” 

What did you give from the bottom of your heart?  Was it your talent, your experience, your time, your attention, your resources?

Give with no strings attached.

• Always make your performance greater than your applause.

Once, I was at the Kennedy Center to watch the opera Samson and Delilah with my kumare who was visiting from Toronto.  Part of the season’s highlights was an exhibit of the formal gowns worn by the first ladies of the United States.  The gowns were all in red, the color of the campaign against SID or Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, better known as crib death.

A lady approached us and asked, “Are you visiting from abroad?”  “Yes,” I replied.  “I’m Kathy,” she said casually as she took my hand to take us to the main hall.  Her face was familiar, but I could not quite place her.

“Don’t we need to buy tickets?”  I asked.  She shook her head and said, “You are my guests, don’t worry.”  I noticed two photographers tailing us and when I looked back, flashing bulbs blinded me.  The lady apologized profusely.  “Oh dear!  I’m so sorry.  If you ask me, I prefer to ban the press from endowment projects.  I believe we accomplish more things if we work silently without pageantry, don’t you agree?”  I smiled back at her.

When I heard the familiar xylophone tone of the theater calling everyone back to his/her seats, she walked back with us until she turned to the reserved box section.  I whispered to my friend, “Let’s leave a token for SID.”  “Quietly and without fanfare,” she bantered. 

After the performance, while standing outside the building, I saw the lady again.  She waved at us before boarding her black stretch limousine.  “Wait, could she be whom I think she is?”  I asked my friend.  The next day, my hunch was confirmed, the news daily read: Katherine Graham, publisher and owner of The Washington Post, at the Kennedy Center.  

You remember Elvis Presley singing about life being a stage and all of us are actors performing on that stage, through laughter and through tears?  Give your best performance, your best effort, as if it was your final act, your swan song.  Not for the deafening applause, the accolades, the standing ovations or shouts of encore.

You gave your all for the best of all.

• Always make your gratitude greater than your success.

My friend came home to settle the estate left by her parents.  She was welcomed by their kapatas, the trusted foreman.  “I have transferred this patch of land in your name for everything you’ve done for our family,” she said.  The kapatas bowed his head and replied, “Your parents already honored me by trusting in my capabilities and treating me like their own child.  Your parents were always generous to my family; there is nothing more I want.  Their kindness was not dictated by what I contributed to their endeavors, it came from the goodness of their heart.”

Now, that was gratitude, on both sides.       

Be inspired by a gird of indebtedness.  No matter how much luck has lined your life or even those curve balls that have been thrown in your court, get down on your knees and say thank you.  There is no greater reward than the warmth in your heart as it beats with a new hymn of thanksgiving.

We have only one lifetime to live, just one.  It is far from any twilight saga, but being thankful can go past that.