Surviving cancer and loving life

Breast cancer is one of the leading causes of death among Filipino women. Though there is no comprehensive cancer registry to determine the exact number of people afflicted with the illness, reports claim the Philippines has the highest incidence of this disease in Southeast Asia. Most patients have no known risk factors, except that they are women.

For most of us, “you have cancer” can be the three most dreaded words in any language. Those who hear them experience several emotions, which often change when they finally accept the news and then deal with it. Some of these feelings may remain buried in the unconscious, but it is essential to bring these feelings into a person’s conscious awareness.

Initially, the diagnosis is always dealt with some degree of denial. Some seem to disbelieve the findings. They go on with their normal lives as though nothing is wrong. They deny their emotions, though internally they are breaking apart. We have been told that is a sure way to self-destruct. 

Those who develop cancer have often felt a sense of despair about their lives and withdraw from any human contact. Many patients experience a flood of self pity and are forever asking the question: Why me? This is accompanied by strong feelings of anger. Cancer patients must be encouraged to express all their resentments, hatred and fears. These emotions and feelings are signs that they deeply care that their lives are threatened.

Time and again research has shown that people who give vent to their negative emotions survive adversity better than those who are emotionally constricted.

To better understand and learn more about the feared big C, the I Can Serve Foundation brought to the city of Cebu recently, Silver Linings, an educational forum on breast cancer held at the Cebu Waterfront Hotel and Casino.

Interesting topics such as: “Everything You Should Know About Breast Cancer,” Dealing With The Side Effects Of Treatments,” “Done With Cancer Treatments, What Next?” were delivered and thoroughly discussed by eloquent speakers and dedicated doctors such as Kelly Salvador, Francis Lopez, Cecilia Llave, Romy de Villa and surgical oncologist Mark Kho. The event was hosted by celebrities that included Pinky Marquez, Melisa de Leon, Maricel Laxa and Karen Davila.

Here are some inspiring thoughts from women who have had to deal with their illnesses they were hardly prepared for.

Kara Magsanoc-Alikpala

Broadcast journalist and documentarian

“It’s been five years since I was told I had breast cancer. The experience doesn’t stop once you’re told you are cancer-free or in remission. The meaning of the experience changes each year. It is like reading the Bible. Your take on a verse changes each time you reflect on it.”

“In these days when everybody rants and raves, and talks of abandoning ship, I simply remember the breast cancer survivor reveling in a community of possibilities. Hopefully, there is a thing or two we can learn from them as they take the lead in showing us there is always hope as long as there is faith.”

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Christie Fedilis J. Caballero

Cancer survivor

“My Lola Fidela, a gracious and gentle lady after whom I was named, died of cancer – cancer of the breast. So in my youthful mind, the word cancer was associated with suffering, old age and death. It never occurred to me that the Big C could hit anyone in the prime of her life. But such was my case. I was only 25 years old when the Big C hit me. I underwent several tests that resulted in ductal carcinoma.

A few days after my operation, I visited my oncologist. My cancer stage was Stage 2B. Although my nodes were negative, my mass was big. My treatment entailed six cycles of chemotherapy and 35 days of radiation therapy.”

Caballero shares with us her journey with cancer:

1. Cancer is not a death sentence. It is called a big C which means a Big Chance in life. Some would say that cancer is a lifestyle disease. It is time for us to change our lifestyle like our food intake, too much worries and pollution.

2. Life is a gift. We have only one life to live. Enjoy life and make a difference. What is important is not how long you live but how well you live. I believe that each one of us has a mission to fulfill. I often wonder why I am always invited to share my story with others, specially so, when I am not good at facing a big crowd. Neither am I good at making speeches. Maybe this is a challenge I have to take.

3. Leave everything to God, and everything else will follow. As Me’anne Alcordo-Solomon would always say, “Faith begins when worries end”.

4. Let love be your inspiration. If not for the love of my husband and family, maybe I would not have chosen to live. When my husband told me, “ We will face this challenge together,” it gave me hope to live. More so, when I think of my mother who is also sick and brother who still needs my support, I told myself – “I MUST LIVE”.

5. Have a positive attitude. What your mind can conceive, your body can achieve. When I joined a support group, I saw happy people there. I asked them how long they have been battling with cancer? Some said eight years, five years, two years etc….I said to myself: “Wow! I can be like them, too.”

6. Health is wealth. Take care of your body. If you notice something strange in your body, see your doctor immediately before its too late. Remember, early detection saves life and saves money, too.

After spending some time with survivors gave a new meaning to life let me add some thoughts of my own.

Though quality of life is the most important thing, people naturally want to extend its longevity as well. Most of those who have changed in response to illness have outlived their doctors´ expectations. By their own lives they have proven that pure and unselfish love and genuine spirituality does increase one’s time as well as one’s joy.

Sadness can be lessened by looking in the mirror and smiling, as long as one is not denying the sadness. Truly, putting a smile will create a different message that is fed back into the nervous system. You can grieve for a loss or a trial, but still keep yourself from losing all perspective, all appreciation for the good things that remain in your life.