What a wonderful world
Ever notice what happens when you place the word “new” in front of something? It loses a bit of its value, especially when judged against the “old” version. Like New Coke. Or The New Adventures of Superman. Or
Now we have the New Seven Wonders of the World. Chosen by Internet vote and worldwide text messaging — so you know it’s scientifically accurate — a private Swiss foundation has declared seven manmade sites as the planet’s new and updated “wonders.” If you haven’t seen the list yet, here it is:
1.
2.
3.
4. The
5.
6. The Colosseum in
7.
1. The Great Pyramids of
2. The
3. The Statue of Zeus at
4. The
5. The Mausoleum of
6. The
7. The Pharos of
You will quickly notice a few points about these two lists. First, there’s no “Rice Terraces of Banaue” on the new “wonders” list, despite this being a text-messaging contest. The
That’s possibly because… it’s bogus! Hey, even UNESCO can’t get behind this new list, saying it “is the result of a private initiative which cannot contribute in any significant or lasting way to the preservation of the elected sites.” Personally, I think the UNESCO is just jealous because Jennifer Lopez showed up at the “new world wonders” ceremony, and not theirs.
The second thing you will notice is that people don’t collect tons of photos of themselves standing in front of the
But the new, improved list is no better. Included on the short list were other man-made wonders that didn’t quite make the final cut. They included Angkor Watt in
We can see Angkor Watt being on there, but the Sydney Opera House? The Statue of
“I have set eyes on the wall of lofty Babylon on which is a road for chariots, and the statue of Zeus by the Alpheus, and the hanging gardens, and the Colossus of the Sun, and the huge labour of the high pyramids, and the vast tomb of Mausolus; but when I saw the house of Artemis that mounted to the clouds, those other marvels lost their brilliancy, and I said, ‘Lo, apart from Olympus, the Sun never looked on aught so grand.’”
Sadly, his lengthy rhapsodizing over Carmen Electra’s Breasts has been lost to the pages of history.
Today’s tourists, in contrast, are spoiled rotten. They want their ancient sites to be perfectly restored and preserved. Immaculately clean, with rubble you could eat off of. We love boasting about the “world wonders” that we’ve checked off our lists (I myself have visited the Great Pyramids, the Colosseum in
“Old” list:
1.The Beatles
2. The Rolling Stones
3. Jimi Hendrix
4. The Who
5. Bob Dylan
6. Led Zeppelin
7. Pink Floyd
“New” list:
1. Kelly Clarkson
2. Clay Aiken
3. Ruben Studdard
4. Fantasia Barrino
5. Carrie Underwood
6.
7. Jordin Sparks
As you can see, “new” is not necessarily “improved.”