The devil may wear Prada but smart travelers prefer Tourister

Flying for most people provides three incredibly important insights into human nature and life as it unfolds in the short span of a flight. One, that in the small, cramped space that constitutes economy class, a wailing child could be cause for a small war. Two, if it is tasteless and generally inedible, airlines will serve it. And three, if your luggage contains something important and breakable, consider it broken.

Thanks to the efforts of indifferent airport crew around the world, luggage gets dragged, tossed and beaten on a regular basis. No doubt more than half the blame should go to the system itself: passengers submit their baggage to a conveyor belt and say sayonara to their well-packed goodies. Then the bags travel down a long, winding lanedown to an open-topped truck where they fall on top of each other, one over-stuffed bag after another, and are unceremoniously tossed into the gut of the plane.

More than several hours and two airline-sponsored martinis later, the system is reversed, only this time, more bags and balikbayan boxes are piled onto each other, always in such a way that the weakest of bags finally meet their breaking point and greet their exhausted, disheveled owners with split seams displaying underwear or – worse –dripping with purloined hotel shampoo.

The rich compensate for the insensitive treatment of their luggage by purchasing expensive, unbreakable suitcases in minimalist black, engraved with their initials and snapped by a lock in metal more luxe than steel. The ultra-rich opt for the initials of bag-makers more prestigious and much vaunted, in styles that have remained unchanged over decades, like trunks and valises in monograms that anyone worth their Vogue subscription would recognize in an instant.

But what about the rest of us poor folk who have to deal with the forceful and unceasing wails of undrugged, undisciplined children in economy class? We may have to travel cattle-style, but must our luggage face the same treatment?

Paupers with high aspirations (how else can one explain young travelers who live from paycheck to paycheck and skip breakfast and dinner to save up for a trip to Brazil or Sweden?) or value-conscious business people can opt for the quality hardware minus the high pricetag.

Acquired by Samsonite in 1993, American Tourister has been the go-to label for hardy, practical luggage for more than half a century. Currently sold in about 20 countries worldwide, the label began in the ’30s under the auspices of Sol Koffler, who created tapered suitcases that were lighter and space-efficient. The label greeted the ’50s with the industry’s first molded luggage, a Tourister trademark that no other label has been able to copy since.

But it was in the ’70s that the label exploded onto the scene with the iconic ad featuring a cantankerous simian by the name of Oofi. "Dear clumsy bellboys, brutal cab drivers, careless doormen…" declared the gentleman narrator, as a man placed a hardside suitcase inside a cagewith a curious gorilla, "…ruthless porters, savage baggage masters,"he continued. As he spoke, the gorilla, played by an actor named DonMcLeod, who would go on to play other memorable apes in Trading Places and Naked Gun 2 and 1/2, began to hurl the bag across the cage and stomp on it. The primate continued to put the bag through a rigorous workout as the voice-over continued, listing all the people who contribute to the damage of luggage everywhere. Shot for a grand totalof $33,000, the ad ran for 15 years – considered a century in ad standards – and made it to the hall of fame, with cultural notables such as TV Guide and VH1 naming it one of the best ads ever made.

Today the label has continued its promise of quality and durability at more affordable prices with its soft, as well as hardside, luggage in durable finishings. The label ranges from a line of hardy suitcases in black, blue and red to backpacks and duffel bags in saffron and mint. Sets of luggage ideal for families go for less than P10,000, a steal considering the product comes with the stamp of quality, courtesy of parent company Samsonite.

Each bag goes through a series of tests such as the tumble test (where bags are placed in a container with obstacles and made to go through 25 revolutions), drop test (from a height of 1.2 meters in -12 degrees Celsius), wheel test (where bags are jostled for 15 kilometers) and the zipper test (force is applied to sliders and zippers), among others. The tradition of durability is inherent in each American Tourister bag, whether it’s the colorful backpack your daughter sports to school, the black computer case your spouse carries to work or the blue carryon you’re toting on the airport tarmac.

With its stringent adherence to lower price points and high quality, it’s now possible for travelers to check their baggage without spending the following hours up in the air worrying whether a side split will reveal to the general luggage-toting public at the baggage claim their penchant for ratty underwear and cheap toiletries.

If there’s anything a good piece of luggage should provide, it’s peace of mind. And at 15,000 feet in the air, that counts for a lot more than a seat in business class and a glass of booze.

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American Tourister is available at all SM Department Stores and Travel Club stores.