Do you really know how to have fun?

The New Year is 22 days old. By this time, you have been able to reflect on the personal life you intend to build this year, the professional path you want to map, the road you want to travel, the relationships you aim to strengthen, the fun times you desire and mind-numbing activities you wish to end.

Fun is the groundwork for making your business and life meaningful. There isn’t anything frivolous about having fun. In fact, learning how to have fun is one of life’s most serious themes, recognizing that without fun, relationships won’t work. When your job isn’t fun, it turns uninteresting, intolerable and unenlightening. When people around you aren’t fun, it is distressing. When your workplace isn’t fun, day-to-day work becomes a drag. When your life isn’t fun, it is hard to be hopeful and spiritual.

Most of us don’t really know how to have fun. Often, we force ourselves to do things that are supposed to be fun, but repeatedly end up with unfulfilled expectations. The high we hope to experience is not there. We wear the facade of satisfaction in our office and at social events, yet in unguarded, pensive moments, our jaw drops and our face becomes frozen and exhausted. And, when asked how things are going, we retort, “It couldn’t be better,” or “Okay naman” — a hardcore Pinoy air. In truth, it could very well be “It couldn’t be worse” or “Minamalas, walang swerte,” a state you may be in but keep on denying.

“Get the most out of life” is a common self-help mantra. You are told to prioritize those things that are really important. You are reminded not to miss out on the best that life has to offer, not to get sidetracked by things that are of little consequence, and to focus instead on what is more deserving of your time and energy. If you are too wrapped up in your job to rest and engage in recreation, you may realize too late that you failed to seize the opportunity to enjoy rewarding experiences. If you are too busy keeping the business in order and don’t have time to hang out with friends and family, you may one day realize that you missed out on the better part of living. And if you decide to aggressively participate in the rat race, you might win the competition and receive the prize, but such commitment may mean putting in extended working hours that prevent you from moments of closeness, discovering too late that no fat bank account can substitute for lost fun time.

You can be a “creature of fun,” sociologists and religious leaders say, but to achieve this you must spell out your values clearly. Your priorities must be the stuff that matters most: a good family life, satisfying work patterns, constructive business engagements, genuine spirituality, and doable personal dealings. You are urged to get involved in the more essential elements of your existence, with a mission that starts with a clearly defined value system.

The New Year comes with new hopes. As you resolve to do better in all aspects of your life, consider these reminders:

• Have fun as you perform your job. View employment or an entrepreneurial concern as more than a way to enrich yourself materially. Work should enhance your humanness and leave you joyous, keeping in mind that if you do it for the right reasons and with the right attitude, you earn the right rewards.

• Make your own good life. How many times have you been told that you should not leave life to chance or luck?  You may be encouraged to create new conditions to ensure good vibes. Who wants to be stuck in a rut of “usual conditions,” anyway? Make your own good luck. The uninspired should take his own fate by the horns and chart his own destiny. Good luck is never by chance. It comes from building the right conditions to bring the right results.

• Don’t feel good about the notion that your future has been mapped out by some unknown intelligence. Make no mistake: you may attract good fortune based on the charms and amulets you wear coupled with divine magnanimity, but you all have the free will that allows you to decide what you want to make of yourself.  You are free agents that can decide on the tasks and challenges that confront you. Success and happiness are earned through hard work and intelligence. Surmounting the obstacles and tests that you face every day prepares you for even more daunting challenges ahead. The more skillful you are at it, the more likely you will attain your goals.

• Straighten your distorted value systems. In business and life, take inspiration from Christmas. It can lead you to joyful living. As author Anthony Campolo suggests, “Let us not switch the price tags on the things of true value, to disabuse the notion that the things that really count are worth very little, and that the things that are ultimately worth little are of great value.”

• Treasure your personal or professional reputation. It is a most valued asset, and success in the coming year will rest, in part, on your foundation of values. The anchor of a strong reputation is trust in who you are, what you say and what you stand for. This trust is followed by how you handle responsibility and accountability with grace and dignity, how you leverage good news in your favor, and how you withstand bad news without major damage.

• Make it a habit to celebrate your uniqueness. You are a distinctive individual with the ability and passion to think, act and live as you want. Of course, you’ve had moments of tears and joy, triumphs and defeats, but no one can rob you of your capacity to avoid sadness, dread and negativity and lead your life to happiness, passion and positivity. Never get fed up with life and quit; believe that you’re not a loser until you quit trying.

• Ingrain spirituality in everything you do. Recognize that there is a higher power, and that your human efforts have limits. Thus, you should trust in the guidance and will of something greater than you. As such, you let go and let God.

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Email bongosorio@gmail.com for comments. Thank you for communicating.