Dear Nanay,
My boss retired at the end of last year and so now I have a new boss. Unfortunately, I don’t seem to be working well with my new boss. Our personalities just don’t match. I don’t want to leave my job because I really like it. And I am 58 years old already, so I am concerned about being able to find a new job. But I don’t know if I can last much longer here. What do you think I should do?
— Lost
Dear Lost,
If I were you, I would just stay in my current job. Baka dapat tiisin mo na lang. Wala kang magagawa. (Maybe you should just bear it. You can’t do anything about it.) You have to do things his way.
But have you ever considered that maybe his way is better? Instead of finding conflict in your relationship, look at things from his point of view and you might realize that things are not so bad.
You are right when you say it could be difficult for you to find a new job at your age and this is made worse by the economic crisis today. So it might not be worth it for you to take the risk of not being able to find work elsewhere. Besides, even if you could find employment in another company, who says that your boss over there will be any better than this one you have now?
If you really want to leave, do not resign until you are assured of a job elsewhere. Maybe one of these days, in an emotional moment, you might suddenly give up and say something like “Ayaw ko na! (I give up!) I quit!” Papaano iyan? Bigla kang mawawalan ng trabaho? (What if you suddenly lose your job?) If you resign, make sure you have a back-up plan or another job waiting for you. Otherwise, just hang in there and try to see things from his perspective. It is rarely as bad as you think when you keep an open mind to new ways of doing things.
Sincerely,
Nanay
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Dear Nanay
My daughter just completed her nursing studies and now we are being told that hospitals will only hire her if she agrees that she will work without pay as a trainee. She really wants to go abroad but she needs the experience. But to get the experience she needs to work without pay. How is that? What can we do?
— Linda
Dear Linda,
Unfortunately, if your daughter really wants to be a nurse, then you might not have a choice. There really is not much anyone can do if hospitals are only hiring new graduates as trainees. I don’t know if it will make you feel better, but there are many other professions where some kind of practicum or on-the-job training is required. And often, these are also without pay.
Instead of being frustrated, why don’t you look at the bright side? Look at the situation as an additional investment. Isipin mo na lang na parang dagdag na pag-aaral ang ginagawa ng anak mo pero walang tuition! (Just look at it as further studies for your daughter, but you’re not paying tuition!) And your daughter’s compensation is the training she will receive, as well as the credentials that will allow her to pursue her dreams.
Hold on. Just a little more sacrifice and you are almost at the finish line. Be supportive of your daughter’s dreams and I am sure that it will all pay off in the end.
Sincerely,
Nanay
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