Worrying is a waste of time
You may or may not agree, but living (in most parts of the world) nowadays seems to have bogged down in a bottomless pit of unhappy news. You are hard-pressed to find any significant development that could be considered upbeat. Recent developments that have made it to the front pages of both general interest and business sections provide us with a litany of troubling and (sometimes) frightening news: the melamine scare, overseas Filipino workers (wherever they are), possibly losing their jobs as a result of the worldwide financial crisis, the stock market crash, the release of a celebrated jailbird, and a discriminatory comedy skit against Filipino women broadcast by a major station. The list goes on and on.
On the lighter side of the news — the entertainment pages — there’s more of the same thing: a talent manager at odds with her talent, a young actor hooked on dangerous drugs, a young upstart allegedly committing suicide, long-time reel and real partners calling it quits, a rags-to-riches comedian losing hard-earned funds due to excessive gambling, a starlet hooking up with a very-much-married director, ad nauseam.
For a while, you might have thought this whole negativism thing was but a product of your own mind. What is going on here? Have you really turned into an old curmudgeon or absolute cynic who can only see the world in pessimistic shades of doubt? Has the onslaught of all this not-so-good news finally triggered some neural switch that allows you only to see the unappealing aspects of everything? Even the comic section of the newspapers has cartoon characters talking about going hungry, political sniping and the futility of existence.
As you may realize, your split-second attack of anxiety may not be isolated or confined to you alone. Many may share your cynicism. Although this may also reveal the kind of friends you may be hanging out with (a bunch of neurotics?), this cynical bug, for sure, has afflicted at least a good majority.
Looking For Good News
But wait: try to rack up a list of good news that you may have read or heard about lately. The oil strike in Galoc, Palawan, that can yield 22,000 barrels a day, lower gas pump prices, thousands of jobs available for Filipinos in Canada and Australia, melamine-infested food products being pulled out of retail outlets as the Bureau of Food and Drugs (BFAD) clears 34 products from melamine contamination, Ateneo, UP, La Salle and UST making it to the list of the top 500 universities in the world, and an increase in tourist arrivals despite the downturn, among others.
Where else does one go looking for good news? In sports or the arts? A recent feature on a Filipino ice skater who found fame participating in major skating competitions abroad is motivating. A Pinoy making it in such a sport is a feat when the country does not even have snow. How about the revival of art appreciation among the general population courtesy of the movers of the Amorsolo retrospective? Clearly, in a country where about 80 million of its more than 88 million citizens worry about their next meal, paying to watch skaters strutting and circling around a skating rink or visiting museums is not among the top priorities. But of course, you can always try to encourage them.
In spite of the murmured threats of the continuing financial crisis, you must remember there’s always a silver lining behind the dark clouds that every now and then gather above — like OFW remittances, which are up by over 10 percent and will continue to increase as Christmas approaches. You simply have to glimpse that silver lining more often. Many Pinoys, though, remain unmoved by these developments. Perhaps because most are busy trying to eke out a living or, like the proverbial ostrich whose head is stuck in the sand, choose not to know. To a lot, ignorance is bliss.
A Healthy Dose Of Faith
You keep wanting to step back, believing in the notion of the big picture; the more you see of the landscape, the more likely you will see the pattern of things. Try to put together a collage of the news items you read every day and attempt to put together a macro-picture of the lives of Filipinos hoping to glimpse the rationale behind the seemingly endless stream of trials that we have been going through. Perhaps you can find solace and comfort in a healthy dose of faith.
For sure, you will agree that it cannot go on like this. Even the best of the country’s strategists are stumped for answers when asked for a way out. Perhaps it’s time to really say it like it is, no gloss, no sugarcoating and no spin. It may help to admit to the problems and focus the Pinoy’s collective energies on solving them. Enough of the rosy forecasts and picture-perfect declarations. Remember the infamous “we are out of the economic crisis” speech? During trying situations, you must call a spade a spade and bite the bullet. Either that or you bite the dust.
What? You worry?
Setting up conditional happiness, success or other outcomes leads to ever-increasing negative feelings. But setting up dual happiness — happiness for both now and later — allows for good moments at any time. Dr. Spencer Johnson, best-selling co-author of The One Minute Manager, advises people to live in the present without allowing negative attitudes to fester. A setback is only one moment in time. It ends. The next moment is up to you. “Make that next moment one of learning and the growth will happen by and of itself. Before you know it, you will be where you wanted to be from the start,” Johnson emphasizes.
Living, especially during these days, involves two areas: the things you can control and the things you can’t. Don’t worry about what you can’t control. Worrying is a total waste of energy. Train your focus on the future. It is something you can have power over. But don’t fret about it either. Move it. Manage it. What about the present? It’s in your hands. Live it the way you want to live it. Bring it to where you will be happiest even in challenging times such as today. Stay focused on what you want to happen, and you will attract exactly what you want.
Goals can be set. Positive experiences can be sought. Good news can be created. You just have to focus unfailingly on the picture. Happiness, after all, consists in getting what you desire and desiring what you have.
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You may e-mail bongo@vasia.com or bong_osorio@abs-cbn.com for comments, questions or suggestions. Thank you for communicating.
