I am not an online harasser. I am not a liar!” These were the words of a subdued and dignified 35-year-old professional who lived and worked in Kentucky, USA. It just happened to Elizabeth, who described herself as a reasonably private person who never abused her computer, and who used the machine sensibly and well.
When she opened her e-mail inbox one day, she found angry responses to a message purportedly written by her, though the sender had forged her name. After these came phone calls and postal letters filled with indignation, and even death threats. Two days later she saw her dog — dead in her backyard. It was such a gruesome experience that she panicked and, since the firm where she worked had close ties with local media, told them about what had been happening to her. There was, in fact, quite a multitude of people who hated her now. Someone had used her name on the Internet, used abusive language, even forged her signature. She had gone to the media hoping that the coverage would discourage anyone from really harming her, since now they knew that it was not she responsible for the abusive e-mails directed at them.
It didn’t take long after that for Elizabeth to discover who was pretending to be her. Her name, address and phone numbers had been sent to thousands of people all over the world, to collect donations for a terrorist endeavor. It even included her private telephone number to make it easier for the prospective donors to call and donate money using their credit cards. It was beyond ridiculous.
Elizabeth found out that her call to the media helped. Contacting her ISP (Internet Service Provider) was also a very important thing to do. Before long, she was certain, from all reports, that the harasser was a former boyfriend who simply could not get her off his mind since the termination of their relationship, and wanted revenge for giving him a broken heart. As you can see, corny as this may be, it is a true story.
Indeed, the Internet can be a very naughty machine. It is a lying machine. It provides the instrument to release one’s frustrations and the inner humiliation one feels because of a broken heart.
Internet experiences range from the sublime to the ridiculous. And, of course, it should never be used in the pursuit of a crime. It is the repository of some of the worst experiences, the most hideous sins and shameless lies. It also can be a hope chest of some of the most inspiring experiences and some of the most poignant love stories of all time.
Lies are manufactured “zillions” of times on the Internet. Every harassing statement, every anonymous user who gives a fictitious name (as many of us probably do), every assault and threat dispatched via this worldwide web of a machine cannot help but be held captive by this magic portal of the 21st century.
What, then, must a user do when harassed or threatened online? The following are some of my recommended preventive measures, if not solutions, to the growing problem of online harassment in whatever shape, size or gravity:
1) When victims are being harassed, one of the first things they want to do is to delete all communications received, especially, the obscene, degrading, insulting and vulgar e-mails. You must not do this. It is critical to save every piece of communication you have received, every online dialogue between the two of you whether these are e-mails, IM (Instant Messaging) histories, or chat logs no matter how obscene and ugly these are. If there are any postal letters or any form of offline communications, do not destroy them. In fact, you should keep the envelopes, too. The point is not to destroy any form of evidence.
2) The harasser has to be told by you, in no uncertain terms, that he must stop. And it is certainly not prudent to communicate with the harasser after that. As soon as you make the assessment that you are being harassed, tell the person to stop immediately. Make the message simple and direct through an e-mail, chat, or IM message that, very plainly and in the simplest terms, tells the harasser to discontinue harassing you. It is preferable not to even bother to explain why, since the harasser certainly knows he has been harassing you.
The best thing is to send a copy to his or her ISP together with copies of the harassing content. It is important at this point not to respond to any further communications online or offline. In quite a number of cases, within the context of the Philippines and the US, relevant case studies show that the harasser will always try to contend that it is, in fact, you who is the harasser.
It logically does follow that if you are no longer responding to his or her messages, after your initial message to stop, you are not the harasser. Most of the case studies verify the fact that this is a valuable piece of advice, especially if you end up contacting the police or going to court.
3) The following are important to remember because the venue of the harassment matters. If this was done in a chat room, you must get in touch with whoever runs the website or server you were on. Should it be an IM service, proceed immediately to the terms of services and describe the harassment it has been allowing, using any contact e-mail address given there.
Should there be an anonymous someone who created a web page precisely for the purpose of harassing you, then you should complain to the owners who host that page.
Look on the Web site for contact information because many sites have e-mail addresses specifically for abuse and harassment complaints. Of course you will be complaining to the sender’s ISP plus any e-mail service used to send the messages. Should you receive little cooperation from the particular ISP through specific actions, such as cancelling the harasser’s account or, at the very least, warning them to desist, then you should go to the police authorities.
The problem encountered here is the fact that not too many police authorities are Net-knowledgeable. With exponentially increasing Net crimes, I think it is important to establish a Computer Crimes Unit in the district. Bear in mind that we have online agencies such as Safety Ed International, Cyberswitch, etc. Our country in fact has become more attuned to the times, and some studies are being undertaken for better processes of enforcement, for preventing an e-conflagration which will become a more difficult situation.
4) Bear in mind that we are really not being realistic should we expect an apology from the harasser or any recompense from him or her. But it is rational to expect that you can get the harasser to stop contacting and harassing you. It is also rational to believe that, with the added knowledge and the experience you just went through, as fresh and sharp as it is in your mind, you can reasonably expect to increase your safety online and that of your family.
If stopping the harassment is your objective, it may entail changing your username, chat handle, or e-mail address, or stopping your interesting forays into a certain chat room, forum or news group. You’ve just got to do it.
Your safety should be your primary concern. You will see that, after a while, you can probably return to your old haunts. And you will be going back a much wiser, and more careful, chatter and e-mailer.
Remember Aristotle’s protégé, Plato, who was responsible for teaching his mentor’s philosophy to the people of Athens in the fourth century B.C.? The 20th-century incarnation was, sometime in the 1980s, the Central Data Corporation’s Plato, a computer-aided instruction (CAI). There were actually two Platos: one was a network of over a thousand terminals at nearly 200 locations in the US, connected to a huge, powerful supercomputer at the University of Illinois.
These terminals had very sophisticated (at that time) plasma displays that allowed the student to interact with the computer program through touch-sensitive panels on the screen. The disk drives stored over 8,000 hours of courses on a wide variety of topics, at levels from kindergarten through graduate school.
The new Plato was not a system, but a software — programs on floppy disks that ran on several popular personal computers. That was circa 1980; but technology has seen so many reincarnation and unbelievable successes in computer technology since then, limited only by man’s genius and imagination.
But the lying machine just keeps on laughing. The lies that it stores, and the conflicts spawned, have been overcome by the magnitude of technological successes through almost three decades since CAI. It has now become a world phenomenon.
But does it still lie? Is it still the lying machine? It is the human factor that is responsible for this. You will probably find this quotation somewhere on it, too: “We lie loudest when we lie to ourselves.”
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Thanks for your e-mails sent to jtl@pldtdsl.net.