How to deal withstress

Whenever my Mom returns to Australia, she always goes out of her way to get me self-help books and the like so I always have a lot I can read for myself and share with my readers.

Recently, she brought me something again, but this time in the form of cards – Stress Therapy cards written by Tom McGrath.

What is stress? Stress is a natural part of everyone’s life. It is the physical and emotional agitation you feel when faced with threats and opportunities. Life is filled with events big and small and sad that bring about stress.

When you encounter a stressful situation, your body produces energy and strength. Depending on what stresses us, our reaction can be mild (a shaky voice, sweaty palm) or severe (muscle tightness, shortness of breath, panic).

Stress serves you well when it heightens your creativity, your courage and sense of being alive. When you need to right a wrong, change a bad habit or defend an important value in your life, stress can be your call to action.

But your body isn’t meant to be in a constant crisis mode. While the physical changes that accompany stress are beneficial in the short run, a long period of time, unrelieved stress, may lead to problems like chronic anger, frustration, headaches, muscle strain or even heart problems.

Unrelieved stress also affects your spiritual well-being. If you’re constantly worried and anxious, on the edge, you can’t be open to the goodness of life. It is hard to open up to love when you’re caught in a state of siege.

Stress Therapy offers sound advice, provides practical, effective and insightful guidance for recognizing stress. It won’t make you stress-free but it can help you manage stress in many ways that will enhance your life.

Here are some tips:

• The best way to manage stress is through fundamental faith; this is believing that beneath the stress, all is right with the world. Nurture such a belief. It’s a foundation on which you can build a stress management strategy that will improve your life.

• The impact of stress on your life is determined not so much by what happens to you as much as how you respond to situations. You’ll learn how your reactions increase or reduce the stress in your life.

• Some people rush from one thing to the next, so driven by ambition and the need to succeed that they have forgotten why they have filled their lives with stress. SLOW DOWN. You may be missing the best part of living.

• Stress is in the eye – and heart – of the beholder. By changing your attitude, you can relieve your stress even when outer circumstances don’t change.

• Some people see every bump in life’s highway as a catastrophe and anticipate the worst. Don’t paralyze yourself by magnifying your fears of the unknown and the uncontrollable.

• Some people believe life should be perfect and stress-free. This expectation only sets up more stress. Take life on life’s terms. Accept its ups and downs with grace and humor.

• Some people think they should handle difficulties on their own. But if you have the wisdom to know what you need from others and the courage to ask for it, you’ll ease your stress.

•When you’re feeling stressed, you’re more vulnerable to negative self-talk, that chronic criticism echoing in your head and heart. Counter the negative voice with affirmations about your ability and self-worth. Say, "I’m talented, worth and loved and I believed it."

• Constantly trying to please others guarantees stress. You can respect and love others without living your life for them.

• When you start to feel anxious, ask, "How can I relax now?" Know what stress-relieving techniques work for you, like deep breathing, putting your feet up, listening to music, then do them.

• Doing something for someone else is a great stress-reliever. Make a phone call to a lonely neighbor or bake cookies for the new family down the block.

• The world looks bleak to those who are overtired. Give yourself enough sleep. Your soul will gently work and relieve your anxieties and restore your strength. Your subconscious will creatively devise solutions to your problems.

• Forgive others as well as yourself. Resentment and remorse waste energy on yesterday. Forgive and live today.

• Practice the art of savoring life: the taste of a peach, the smell of morning, the sound of a lark, the sight of a sunrise, the soft feel of a puppy. Stop, look and listen.

• Watch what you eat, when you eat and how. Gulping down junk food on the run is a recipe for stress and discomfort. Eating healthy food with loved ones strengthens the body and restores the soul.

• Laugh. A lot. Humor is a potent stress reducer. Foster a humorous view of life. Be with people who bring laughter to your day.

• Sound health requires human touch. Get your maximum daily requirements of hugs, handshakes and pats on the back. Sports, games and dancing can help bring the human contact you need.

• Time is a precious gift you can use to reduce stress. Make time for an an interruption-free, TV-free, phone-free time in your day. Allow your soul to catch up.

• Walking on a regular basis is a wonderful stress buster. Long, leisurely strolls are good for your health, your heart, your mind and your soul. Walking alone offers solitude, walking with others deepens relationships.

• Free yourself to do what matters most in your life. You can let go of responsibilities that no longer serve their original purpose and say no to new tasks that fail to further your core goals.

• As a preventive measure, incorporate stress-relieving techniques in your workday. Take sanity breaks. Look out the window. Walk around the block. Really taste the cup of coffee or tea.

• Some responses to stress not only make the situations worse, they can indicate deeper problems you need to address. If you react with drug or alcohol abuse, overeating, anger, tantrums, self-pity, isolation or feeling powerless or victimized, you’re seriously harming your life. Seek help.

• Nature heals. The sound of birds, sparkling sunlight on a serene lake, the night sky, aglow with stars all offer a balm to weary hearts and souls. When you can’t go to nature, bring nature to you with an aquarium, plants, a flower box or an indoor rock garden.

• Develop the trust that life will provide you with what you need. Serenity comes not in having what you want but in wanting what you have.

• The ultimate stress therapy is to remember the deeper truth of your life – that you are loved. When stress and its effects begin to overwhelm you, listen to the voice of God, who beckons, "Come to Me when you are weary and I will give you rest."

The first step to coping with stress in your life is to recognize it first. Then you can find which ways will help you deal with it.

I hope that Tom McGrath’s wise and sound rules will offer you easy-to-use strategies for stress management so that your response to stress will be realistic, healthy and effective.

(E-mail the author at babyjackster@hotmail.com)