We live in times that force us to see the duality, contrasts or oppositions of things: good and bad, light and dark, left and right, yin and yang, man and woman, the feminine and the masculine. They are dual states that cannot exist without the other, two conditions that are each other’s opposite yet are each other’s answer to wholeness or oneness. This is the same with hurting and healing. One cannot be without the other; they are two sides of one coin. For every hurt must heal in time, no matter how long that time will take.
All of us know this process for all of us have been hurt in the past. Many of us are still hurting at this moment. Heartbreaks and disappointments, rejections, unfulfilled longings, grief, anxieties and fears – all bring throbbing pain. The list can be endless for the reasons that pierce the human heart. And the heart always has a reason. To be hurt is to be human for hurting is part and parcel of the journey of life. When we hurt, it signals the fact that there’s something that we must work on in ourselves, that there is some issue we must come to terms with. The hurt and pain remind us of the true human state – to know that we are not perfect. The hurt signals that we must focus all our attention to that issue now, this moment. Not tomorrow (by shelving it to the side hoping to dull the pain that it would somehow miraculously go away). Now. This moment. It is the heart telling us to pay attention to the soul’s needs.
Sometimes the hurt or pain is even more subtle. The first message may come through our subconscious – on a spiritual level. We may feel or perceive a nagging discomfort: a job that doesn’t seem to fit; a relationship where something deeper is lacking; a stagnant relationship. We just know deep inside that something just isn’t right – that we may compromise our inner standards and values to the outside world, a person, or worst, our fear of standing up to any changes that need to be done. These can all be causes for feeling hurt and pain inside.
There is no time frame when a hurt begins to heal. It is all about a process of becoming more conscious, being aware of the causes of our hurts, taking back steps to try to see things objectively, having the spiritual understanding that these are all lessons in the journey of our soul’s evolution. One thing is carved in stone though – and it is that true healing begins with the knowledge that it is only you who can heal yourself. No matter how many well-meaning loved ones and friends surround you and help you towards the path of healing, no matter how many nights you kneel in prayer and beat your chest, the strength and power to transform belong to you and you alone. The grace or blessings that help you come to you because you have created an opening in your hurt and pain for the Divine light to come in.
A second interesting point I’d like to make is that you must accept the possibility that there just must be more to life than what you previously thought. Our healing objective is to see a vision of reality beyond our present state, beyond what we see now. In other words, healing is all about expanding and getting out of one state to advance to another higher, and more expanded state. We all heal in the perfect time once we acknowledge that we are no longer comfortable and happy in the state of hurting, when our consciousness expands and we truly want to move on. Once we decide this, all our energies (mind, heart and body united) bring about that shift to a higher or different state. Transformation begins to happen and we get healed.
Let me put this in a macro level. The world we are in today is badly hurting. The wars, epidemics, poverty, destruction of our earth, the pollution and so many other factors spell MAJOR CRISIS and reflect the picture of hurting humanity. It is humanity’s collective soul screaming in pain! To put it bluntly and honestly, God, the Universe, Allah, The Goddess, Whatever-Whoever we call the Divine, will not help us if we don’t help ourselves. This is the first realization. Each of us must do our own share to begin the healing process. It is not the global leaders, the government or anyone else but ourselves who can get us out of this crisis. It is a spiritual crisis of our collective soul seeking change. And we will get out of this since the universal law of change is constant. That which hurts will naturally heal in its own good time. Let’s just help make that time come quicker by beginning the transformations within us. By healing ourselves, we call forth into the world the energies of letting go of the past, the negativities of anger, pain and the regrets.
Let the duality of hurting and healing mean something in our individual lives. Let each of that polarity be given its integrity. Dive and go fully into the hurt/pain. In that dive is the understanding of the depths, its causes, and roots. Only after the dive can the rise begin towards healing. If we can begin this transformation now, then we give new meaning to Easter’s glorious story of resurrection.
(E-mail the author at jej1@easycall.com.ph)